An Impossible Choice
by Viridis Lupus
Summary: Convinced of her right to the throne, Morgana sets her cruellest plan yet into motion. With two lives hanging in the balance, who will Arthur choose and what will that mean for the future of Camelot?
1. The Heart of Camelot

**Author's Note - Hello guys. Yes, I'm semi-back. I had an idea that I couldn't shake so I've started a new long-ish fic. Unfortunately, this means that several of my other on hiatus and in progress fics will be left by the wayside so sorry to those reading them.** **However, I hope you all enjoy this new fic. And bear with me whilst I get my bearings in the world of Merlin again.**

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><p>"<em>Nothing<em> is working," Morgana hissed through her teeth, glaring into the heat of the fire. "Arthur grows stronger by the day. His kingdom – _my_ kingdom! – is becoming larger and more impenetrable. He is protected from every angle and every plan; every assassination I attempt is thwarted." She slammed her fist down on the hard wood of her table. "But I cannot allow this to continue. Arthur and Camelot must fall." Her keen eyes searched the dancing flames, their green depths shimmering in the firelight.

"But what must be done?" A dark, mahogany tone sliced through her trance like an oar through swirling water. Her gaze snapped from the hearth to the speaker. Agravaine stared back with those beetle black, unfeeling eyes.

"We must find a new method of felling Arthur Pendragon," Morgana replied, her voice husky and intense with growing excitement. "If we cannot slay him by strength and sinew or even by the darkest of arts then we must strike somewhere new."

"Where?"

A nasty smile curled Morgana's beautifully pale lips. "His heart, of course. His heart and his soul."

"But how, m'lady?" Agravaine too had grown excited, his own mouth twisting into an expectant smirk.

"They say that Arthur is the heart of his kingdom, the 'golden child' of Camelot, beloved by the people for his courage, his integrity, his unquestionable loyalty." Contempt dripped from Morgana's lips with each word she spoke. She may have grown up with Arthur Pendragon; even called him her brother, but she held no love for him now. He was the enemy; the one obstacle between her and the throne of Camelot. It was her unwritten destiny to bring about his downfall. "So…we destroy his heart and we destroy Camelot – for good."

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><p>Arthur let out a howl of pain as the mace connected with his hand, his sword clattering to the ground. In total agony, almost blinded by the pain, he managed to duck to the left just in time to avoid a second blow that would have collided with his skull. Instead he heard the heavy ball whistle past his ear and smash into a nearby tree trunk. However, he didn't have much time to consider quite how lucky he'd been because his opponent was far from giving up. Scrambling around on the floor, Arthur found the hilt of his sword and tried to grab hold of the leather grip. Immediately, white-hot pain lanced through his hand. He couldn't even pick up his own sword!<p>

For the first time in a long time Arthur felt fear prickle inside him. Without his fighting arm he was quite useless. This opposing group of knights would kill him instantly. But he couldn't give in yet. Flinging his left arm out, he grabbed the sword and rolled to his feet, careful not to use his injured hand as leverage. Once upright, he was in a better position to assess the situation and his options. Around him Sir Leon and Sir Elyan were fighting fiercely against three other knights whilst Percival was grappling with another against a tree – both of them seemed to have lost their weapons. Sir Gwaine and Merlin, however, were nowhere to be seen. Swallowing his worry at the absence of his weakest friend, Arthur focused on the task at hand. His sword felt slightly heavier and more ungainly in his left hand but thankfully the young king was skilled enough to ignore those differences. With renewed vigour he threw himself into battle against his opponent and soon enough the other man caved, ending up dead on the floor.

Arthur then turned his attention to the other knights and helped them take down their respective attackers. Eventually, the last couple of men fled and the Knights of Camelot found they could breathe a well deserved sigh of relief.

"That was…unexpected," Sir Elyan panted, his eyes still wide and adrenalin filled.

"Yes," Sir Leon agreed, looking perturbed, "Usually parties from enemy kingdoms would never dare venture so close to Camelot Castle itself. My lord, what do you…?" He had started addressing his king but then realised that Arthur was paying him no attention whatsoever. He was too busy looking frantically around the body strewn woodland. "My lord?"

"Where are they?" Arthur demanded. "Where are Sir Gwaine and Merlin?"

"Oh," Leon replied, surprised. He hadn't even noticed they were down in numbers. The fight had been thick, fast and dirty. There hadn't been much time to consider where his comrades were. "I don't….I didn't see."

All four knights began searching the surrounding forest but there was no sign of either man. After awhile they regrouped.

"My lord, I think we should return to Camelot. It is growing dark and your hand…" Percival gestured to Arthur's horribly swollen appendage. "I think it's broken. You'll need Gaius to attend to it."

"I'm not leaving my men behind."

"But sire…"

"No. I shall not return until they are both safe. You know what Merlin's like, he attracts trouble like a drunkard to a barmaid." Despite the gravity of the situation Arthur couldn't help but take a jibe at his ill-fated manservant.

"We know, sire. Though he does have Sir Gwaine with him," Leon pointed out.

Arthur frowned. "I wouldn't trust Gwaine to look after my coat for more than an hour let alone a human being. Come on. We will look some more. They must be nearby. Merlin! Gwaine!" He shouted into the rapidly dimming forest before marching onward. His knights had no choice but to follow.

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><p>Tired and hungry, the depleted band of knights came to a halt at the edge of the forest and stared out onto the open meadowland. A flock of sheep were grazing quietly on the hilly pasture, their white fluffy bodies illuminated by the brightly shining moon. The world was eerily silent. A barn owl drifted like a shadow through the dark sky.<p>

"My lord, I think we should return…" Leon began.

"There!" Arthur hollered abruptly, kicking his horse forward.

For a moment none of the knights could see what he was so excited about but then they too noticed the lumpy shape revealed by the movement of some of the sheep. They all stormed after their king, hoping they wouldn't be too late.

Arthur pulled his horse to an abrupt halt and leapt off the animal's broad back. The thud of his boots and the snorting of his horse scared the sheep and they scattered. This left only the lumpy shape in the middle of the field. The young man hurried towards it – his hand was half on his scabbard, just in case – and hissed, "Merlin?"

Something grunted.

Slowly a head rose out of the dark mass and Arthur immediately recognised the scruffy mop of his best friend. He felt his heart swell in relief.

"Merlin!" he exclaimed, "Merlin, where on earth have you been? And please don't tell me you were taking a nap."

The way Merlin looked at him with slightly unfocused eyes told Arthur there was something wrong so he stopped his banter and immediately became serious.

"Are you hurt?" His tone was sharp and concerned.

"I…" Merlin began, "Not really." However the rough edge to his voice told Arthur otherwise. "It's Gwaine who needs help." He gestured to the misshapen lump beside him. "He was stabbed."

"Stabbed? Where? What the hell happened, Merlin?"

"His shoulder. I…I don't remember much," the manservant whispered, feebly.

"How can you not remember?"

"I think maybe because of this," Sir Elyan had joined them and he caught Merlin's head gently in his hands and tilted the crown towards Arthur. His raven black hair was glistening in the moonlight and stuck together in clumps and Arthur could just about make out the jagged cut to his scalp. "I think it was made by an axe butt but I can't be sure. Let's just say Merlin's lucky to be alive, let alone remember anything."

"No," Merlin murmured, "I said I didn't remember much but I do remember something. I was with you when the knights attacked."

"And god knows why they did," Leon interrupted, still worried about that unanswered question.

"But then two of them grabbed me. Gwaine saw, I think. I struggled so I guess they must have knocked me out. And other than that I have no idea how I ended up here or what happened to Gwaine other than he's badly injured and he probably saved my life."

"Well, let's get you both back to Camelot and Gaius," Arthur decided. He knelt down and helped Percival lift Gwaine, who was barely conscious, onto his horse – they had brought Merlin and Gwaine's abandoned horses with them. He watched as Elyan helped Merlin stagger to his feet and wobble over to his horse. If Arthur didn't know better then he would say that Merlin looked like he'd stayed for one too many tumblers of ale at the tavern. "He can't be expected to ride like that," Arthur said as Merlin practically walked into his mount's side. "Here, Percival, you lead Gwaine's horse back and Leon ride behind. Elyan and I will keep an eye on Merlin."

Once he'd issued his instructions, Arthur turned back to Merlin who was still struggling to clamber into his saddle. Suddenly, he let out a great retch and vomited on the ground.

"Lovely, Merlin, just what I want after a long day saving your backside. Again."

"Dunderhead," Merlin muttered but his insult lacked any bite as he leant against his horse's rump for support.

"Come on, you," Arthur sighed, "You're not riding in that state. You can ride behind me like the girl you truly are. Elyan, can you help Merlin onto Passelande, please?"

"Certainly, sire. Are you sure you don't wish for Merlin to ride with me though? I mean you have your hand…"

"My hand is fine for now," Arthur replied, sharply. Seeing Elyan's expression, he softened his tone. "Besides, I need you to ride behind to see if he falls off and if he does then just lift him straight back on."

"Of course, my lord."

After Arthur had mounted Passelande – with a little difficultly due to his injury – he helped Elyan to heave Merlin onto the saddle behind him. Once they were all set they headed off after the rest of the knights. Initially Merlin didn't hold onto Arthur but after a time he grew too exhausted to hold himself straight and he found himself leaning on his master in order to stop himself falling off.

"You alright, Merlin?" Arthur said, not turning round.

"Yeah," the manservant muttered, "Just giving you a hug."

"Hmm…" Arthur harrumphed in a half irritated manner but really he was just glad his friend was alright. "Just make sure you don't go to sleep. You mightn't ever wake up again."

"You'd like that wouldn't you?"

"Yeah, then maybe I could finally get some peace and quiet."

They rode back to Camelot in relative silence with only the beating of Passelande's hooves disrupting the night. Occasionally Arthur would nudge Merlin in the ribs just to make sure he stayed awake and wasn't lulled to sleep by the rhythmic movement of the horse's loping gait. He received several frustrated shoves back for his trouble and several loud – perhaps deliberate – yawns in his ear. Eventually though they spotted the beautiful castle rising in the distance, large fires burning on the battlements to lead the king home. As usual, Arthur felt his heart beat a little faster when he saw Camelot, his home, safe haven and the heart of his kingdom. He was very glad to return.

When they arrived in the castle courtyard, Arthur waited for Elyan to help Merlin down off the horse and then slipped off himself. By this time Percival and Leon had taken Gwaine off his horse and were carrying him up to the front doors. Gaius and several others had come to meet them. They were all holding flaming torches that illuminated their tired faces and looked rather relieved to see the king's party return.

"My lord," Gaius began, ducking his head in a sign of respect before continuing, "What in god's name happened?"

"We were attacked by a band of knights, Gaius, other than that I have no idea. Sir Gwaine is seriously wounded and Merlin isn't fairing too well either."

"I will treat them immediately," Gaius replied, sparing a glance at his ward, "But, sire, what about your hand?" He had just caught a glimpse of the grotesque fist that Arthur was trying to hide by his side. The physician reached for it but Arthur pulled away.

"Gaius, treat Merlin and Gwaine. I will come and see you as soon as I have sorted out several other matters."

Gaius frowned at him, looking like he wanted to say more but refraining. "As you wish, my lord." He then followed Percival and Leon into the castle.

"Where is my uncle?" Arthur asked one of the bystanders. "I must speak with him."

"I believe he is in the council chambers, sire, anxiously awaiting your return. He has been in there for hours."

"And where is Guinevere?"

"She was with Lord Agravaine. She made him his supper."

"Good," Arthur nodded, "At least I know she is safe."

Swiftly, he thanked all the loyal people who had waited up for him and bid them to bed. Once they had dispersed he headed for the council chambers, eager to seek advice from his uncle but even more eager to see Guinevere's beautiful face.

Pushing open the grand doors of the council chambers, he immediately saw Agravaine pacing by the window and then his gaze sought out Gwen. He spotted her standing awkwardly in the corner, head down, fiddling with the collar of her pretty blue dress. A smile instantly graced Arthur's face.

"So, Guinevere, have you given up on me yet?" His tone was playful but also caring.

Gwen's head shot up and her face shone with happiness.

"Arthur!" She ran towards him, hitching up her skirt and threw herself into his arms. "I've been worried sick." Arthur grunted in pain as she knocked his injured hand and Gwen looked down, gasping when she saw it. "Oh, Arthur, what happened?" she breathed, hastily pulling away from him.

"Its superficial, I'm sure," Arthur replied, gruffly.

Gwen glowered at him. "Don't lie to me, Arthur Pendragon. You need to get that seen to _now_."

"But I wanted to see you," the young man said, sincerely and Gwen couldn't help but smile. However, that didn't stop her from giving him a half annoyed, half affectionate hit on the shoulder.

"And for that, I do love you but-"

"Ahem," Agravaine made his presence known, loudly, reminding the two lovers that they were not alone. Immediately, they leapt apart. "As much as it's lovely to see this little…reunion." He spoke as if there was something vile tasting on his lips. "The king and I must speak alone about what has occurred tonight."

"You are right, of course, Uncle." Arthur looked abashed. "Guinevere, I will see you tomorrow."

"Yes, my lord," Gwen said, curtseying and looking embarrassed. A red flush splashed her neck and her cheeks with colour. "But make sure you see Gaius before you go to bed."

"I will," Arthur assured her.

Gwen then left quickly and Arthur couldn't help watch her go, wistfully. However, he was brought back to earth as Agravaine plunged into hurried questioning.

"Were there…any casualties tonight, sire? Any…abductions?"

"Abductions? No. Well, actually, funny you should say that as Merlin nearly got kidnapped by a couple of knights. But that's just his bad luck shining through as always, I guess. However, we did have injuries. Gwaine was stabbed in the shoulder, Merlin given a nasty head wound and I…well I have damaged my hand with a mace. No deaths though, thankfully."

If Arthur hadn't of known better he would have almost said that his uncle looked disappointed by the night's results. In Arthur's opinion they had been very, very lucky to come out of that ambush as unscathed as they had.

"And the men? Did you…question them about why they were…ahem…in Camelot?"

"Didn't get the chance," Arthur sighed, rubbing the back of his head, "Two of them we killed and the rest escaped. We were more concerned with finding our lost men, to be honest."

"Oh, that's…good. Very noble of you," Agravaine said, quickly. "Never leave a man behind."

"Exactly."

"Especially that young servant of yours, what's his name…Merlin?"

"No, I would never leave Merlin behind," Arthur admitted, feeling tiredness creeping into his mind, "Though one of these days I swear he'll get me killed with one of his no-brain mishaps. But he's one of my truest friends so I'd do anything for him."

"Even though he's a servant?" Agravaine queried, curiously.

Arthur glanced at him, looking for a moment unsure of his confiding in his uncle who had already expressed distaste at his relationships with servants. However, he was his own king now and he could like and dislike and make friends with whom he wanted.

"Yes, even though he is my manservant. I'd trust him with my life, Uncle, perhaps even more so than my knights."

"Hmm…it's good to have friends that you care about so much and that care about you."

"Yes. I don't know what I would do without them," the king replied, earnestly.

"Precisely," Agravaine seemed to agree, though Arthur found it a strange use of the word. Still, he made no comment. "You must sort out your hand now, Arthur. I will see you in the morning. Good night, my lord."

"Good night, Uncle."


	2. Costly Mistakes

**Author's Note - Thank you very, very much for the reviews. I hope you enjoy the story. **

**Oh and sorry, I forgot to say in the first chapter, this is set in Season 4 and contains spoilers.**

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><p>"You have broken the hand in two places. Here. And here." The elderly physician tapped the stiff bandage covering Arthur's skin. "All I can do is strap it up and allow it to heal of its own accord. I will give you some medicine for the pain but you must promise me that you will rest it well. No strenuous activities: riding, sword practice, fighting…"<p>

"Gaius," Arthur interrupted, his tone incredulous, "You can't expect me not to do those things! I am king, I must protect my kingdom. I can't just sit around doing nothing."

"Why not, Arthur? It would give me a nice holiday," Merlin's voice teased from the other side of the chambers where he was lying flat out on Gaius' bed. He had a large bandage wrapped tightly around his own head that made his dark hair stick out from beneath it at strange angles.

Arthur snorted. "Ha, you wish. You do realise you'll be the one at my beck and call; feeding me, dressing me, helping wipe my backside…"

"On second thoughts," Merlin yelped, turning worried eyes on Gaius, "I'm sure Arthur is capable of doing the activities he normally does, Gaius."

The physician merely raised his eyebrow, amusedly, at Merlin before turning back to his king. "I'm afraid to say I still disagree, sire. In order for your hand to heal perfectly you cannot move it or jolt it otherwise you may find it becomes completely useless in the future. I have seen it happen before, my lord."

Arthur considered his long-time physician and carer for a few moments, studying his lined, serious face. He knew that Gaius would not enforce this restricted mobility upon him if he didn't think it necessary for his health. He would only ever do what was best for Arthur. Sighing, the young man glanced down at his bandaged hand and then back at Gaius.

"How long?"

"Six weeks, my lord."

"_Six_? _Six_ weeks." Arthur's voice went unnaturally high. Merlin had to stifle a chuckle.

"At least," Gaius confirmed with a nod.

"I can't leave my kingdom unprotected for that long."

"But, sire, it won't be unprotected. Surely you have trained your knights well enough to keep everyone safe in your absence?" Gaius queried, busying himself with tidying away his medicines.

"Well, yes, but…I mean….well, Gwaine will be out of action for a good while and with Lancelot gone…" Arthur's face twisted at little at the mention of his lost comrade. "There will be just three skilled men left to protect Camelot. That's hardly enough."

"Four if you count me," Merlin added, putting up his hand.

Arthur merely waved him away. "You're not a knight, Merlin. And you are _definitely _not skilled."

"Heyyy!"

Arthur ignored him. "So, six whole weeks?"

"Yes, my lord."

"This is _not _going to be pleasant for anyone, trust me," Arthur said with a sigh. "Is Gwaine awake yet?"

"I think he will wake tomorrow."

"Right, I'll be back then," the king promised and then bid them goodnight.

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><p>It was early morning, the sun was just peering over the hills, when a solitary figure rode his horse swiftly into the castle courtyard and dismounted. There were few about to witness his return or to wonder where he'd been for the majority of the dark hours. Those who did briefly glimpse the swish of his black cloak as he entered the castle presumed that Lord Agravaine had been enjoying the company of a lady of the night. They knew better than to think anything more of it.<p>

As the lord travelled up the winding staircase to his chambers, he couldn't help the pleased smile that curled his lips and nor could he quell the beating of his excited heart. The night had been most fruitful. He hoped the day would prove just as successful.

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><p>Merlin was the first to awaken on the cool morning following the rather dramatic previous day. He found he was still in his guardian's bed, having fallen into a deep, exhausted slumber there and presumed that Gaius must have taken up residence in his own cot. Feeling a little chilly, he slithered awkwardly out from beneath the covers and staggered over to the barely burning embers left over from the fire. After a quick glance around the room to check that Gwaine was still sleeping, Merlin turned back to the hearth and lit the fire. His eyes had just transitioned from ochre back to shocking blue when a voice murmured groggily.<p>

"Mother? Is that you?"

Feeling the heat of the fire immediately warm his chilled bones, Merlin couldn't help but snigger a little as he turned to face his friend.

"Do I _look _like your mother, Gwaine?"

Gwaine blinked a few times in his direction before he finally saw that it was not his plump, short, kindly mother standing before him but a scrawny young man with a massive white bandage wrapped around his head and an semi-indignant expression on his face.

"Well, there are similarities," the knight replied, light-heartedly, "I mean, you standing there with your hands on your hips _definitely _reminds me of when my ma used to tell me off for eating all the bread. And there's without doubt a certain feminine charm to your face, Merlin, you can't deny it."

"Ergh!" Merlin threw his hands in the air. "I am _not _a girl."

"Whatever you say, Miriam."

"Shut it, you!"

"Er…Merlin, I don't think you should really be yelling at the man who saved your life," Arthur said as he stepped into the room.

"What are you doing up?" Merlin asked, abruptly.

Arthur quirked an eyebrow. "Well good morning to you too."

"But…you're dressed."

"Your observational skills do blow me away sometimes, Merlin. You know I wasn't being serious when I said you'd have to dress and feed me, don't you?"

"I wouldn't have put it past you," the boy muttered.

"Sorry, what was that, Merlin? Didn't quite catch it?" Arthur mimed cupping his ear even though they both knew he'd heard exactly what his manservant had said.

"Nothing. So, are you here purely to torment me or…?"

"I'm here to check on Gwaine, of course."

"Oh…so you do remember I'm in the room?" Gwaine said, sarcastically. He was now sitting up in bed and watching them both with amused eyes. "I thought you'd forgotten all about me."

"I'm sorry, Gwaine," Arthur apologised, quickly, striding over to stand beside his injured knight's beside. Gwaine's covers had slipped down to reveal the large dressing on his shoulder. It was already seeping a little and would need changing soon. "How are you feeling?"

"I've been better. Having a massive hole in you kind of takes the fun out of things."

"I can imagine," Arthur replied, sympathetically. "Has Gaius given you enough medicine for the pain?"

"Hmm….I could do with a bit more."

Merlin ambled over to Gaius' medicine cabinet and found the correct bottle before pouring some into a cup for Gwaine to drink. He gulped it down greedily before grinning at them.

"It might not do a lot for the pain but it does make everything nice and colourful. And sparkly." His eyes had gone very wide and glassy.

Both Merlin and Arthur eyed him warily.

"Yeah," Merlin muttered, quietly, "I'm definitely not giving him any more of that."

"I think that's probably a good idea," Arthur replied with a hint of a chuckle. He dropped an anchoring hand on his knight's uninjured shoulder. "Soo, Gwaine, what do you remember about yesterday?"

"I….er…. ooh, can you see the stars? See how they sparkle? I do like the sparkles," he slurred.

"Um…." Arthur frowned and looked around, "There aren't any stars, Gwaine." He turned and whispered to Merlin. "He sounds like a drunken magpie." Merlin could only shrug, trying not to double up with laughter. "It probably wasn't a good idea to give him drugs before trying to question him."

"Prob…probably not," Merlin finally managed to choke out before giving in to his laughter.

"You're a fool, Merlin, this is your fault," Arthur sighed, "Surely you should have known this would happen?"

"People…" The manservant was fighting for breath between his laughing spasms. "…Don't tend…to react this….much." Suddenly, he winced and clutched at his head. "Owww."

"Are you alright?" Arthur immediately asked, concerned, reaching towards his friend.

"What on _earth _is going on in here?" Gaius' irritated voice cut through their conversation. The physician was standing at the top of the steps in his night robe, his white fly-away hair in complete disarray and his face the colour of a ripe tomato. "You do realise that this is an infirmary for the _sick_, not a place for having an extremely loud party at this time in the morning."

"Oh, Gaius, we weren't having a party," Arthur began but was cut off by Gaius.

"My lord, you may be king of this realm but you should really know better than to disturb the sick. Now, back to bed, all of you. That includes you, sire." He pointed a firm finger at Arthur who nodded contritely and checked Merlin was alright one last time before leaving.

"I think we broke Gwaine, Gaius," Merlin said, apologetically, gesturing at the dark-haired knight who was busy trying to catch invisible butterflies.

"He'll be fine," the physician sighed and shook his head, "Just let him sleep it off. Now, to bed, Merlin."

"Yes, Gaius."

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><p>It was midday before Gaius permitted Merlin to leave the chambers and he practically danced with glee into the courtyard in order to get some fresh air. Once outside he spotted the three remaining knights practicing their skills on the training ground. However, they were not the only ones out. He also saw the tall, muscular figure of Arthur leaning against one of the wooden dummies, ordering the men to work harder and move faster. Merlin crept up behind him.<p>

"I thought Gaius said you weren't allowed to do this," he said, loudly, making the other man jump about a foot in the air.

"Merlin!" Arthur gasped, "You scared the life out of me."

"Sorry," Merlin said though he didn't sound at all apologetic. A wicked grin curved his lips. Arthur glowered at him.

"Well you would have been sorry if I'd run you through."

"You couldn't have killed me because that would have counted as a strenuous activity," Merlin pointed out primly.

"Merlin," Arthur drawled, "Killing _you_ would never be counted as a strenuous activity. It would be like wringing a chicken's neck. Quick and easy."

Merlin frowned, feeling rather offended. "I'm not that weak, you know."

"Sure you're not," Arthur smiled in a patronising manner.

"I'm not!"

"Hold this then."

As the young man spoke he pushed the wooden man he was leaning on over with his shoulders, sending it straight towards Merlin. Without time to move out of the way, Merlin attempted to stop the extremely heavy dummy fall on him but couldn't. Seconds later he was pinned to the ground, crushed by the huge figurine, and unable to move an inch. He could hear Arthur guffawing above him.

"So sorry, Merlin, but unfortunately I can't help you. I seem to remember you mentioning something about not doing any strenuous activities. What a shame."

"Arthur," Merlin wheezed, "Get it off me."

"I can't, Merlin. Look, I'll go get the knights for you. They can show you how strong a real man should be."

Soon Arthur returned with Percival, Leon and Elyan in tow so they too could witness his humiliation. Merlin felt a burning flush work its way up his neck and paint itself across his cheeks. Even his ears felt red hot.

"Come on then, Merlin, let's get you out of there," Percival said, bending down and lifting the wooden dummy as easily as if it were a child. "There you go."

He shot the boy a grin – thinking this was all a big joke – but the smile dropped off his lips when he saw the humiliated, angry expression on Merlin's face. The boy barely looked at any of them and he didn't say a word. Instead, he stormed off across the grass, clutching his ribs as he went.

"What's up with him?" Arthur snorted, shaking his head, "It was just a joke."

"Do you think he's hurt?" Leon asked, concerned, "Did you take it too far, perhaps, my lord?"

"No, he's just being a pansy about it. Leave him be." Arthur was feeling a little guilty and embarrassed about what he'd done but he didn't want to lose face in front of the knights so he decided he would apologise to his manservant later. "Come on, I want you to continue practicing fighting with your non-dominant hand. It could one day save your life."

They went back to fighting and Arthur barely spared Merlin another thought.

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><p>Merlin rounded the corner of the castle wall and dropped down in a small alcove, drawing his knees up to his chest. It was a little painful but he felt safer bunched up and better hidden. He felt a couple of salty tears trickle down his cheek and brushed them away fiercely with the back of his hand. Why was he crying? Arthur was right; he was just a big over-sensitive girl. Really, he shouldn't let Arthur's little mockery get to him but he couldn't help it. Right now he was in pain and vulnerable and Arthur had just rubbed salt in the wound. He had overreacted but he had a right to. He hated that Arthur seemed to value his service as little more than a handy person to tease; a human punching bag. Recently, the king had definitely seemed to care more but then Merlin could never tell because Arthur was not one to show his emotions. He could have been imagining Arthur's caring side, willing it to exist. He'd even believed they were true friends. One day Merlin would show Arthur just how strong and courageous a person he truly was.<p>

Irritated at Arthur and himself and the injustice of his position in the world, Merlin didn't register the hem of the skirt that had appeared in front of him. It took a small, delicate cough from the owner of the skirt to draw his attention.

"Gwen!" he exclaimed, catching sight of her pretty face.

"Hello, Merlin," she replied, crouching down to his level. "What are you doing down here?"

"Um…I…er…."

"I heard what Arthur did to you," Gwen said, offering him a sympathetic smile, "And I thought it was rather cruel considering what you'd been through. I'll be having words."

"Thanks, Gwen but, really, its fine."

As much as he loved and respected Guinevere, he didn't want her fighting his battles for him. He knew exactly what Arthur would say about that. Plus, he would undoubtedly laugh.

"Oh, alright, if you're sure," Gwen said, looking a little put out.

"I'm sure."

They lapsed into awkward silence. Merlin fiddled with the bandage on his head and Guinevere shifted the basket she was carrying from one hand to the other. Eventually, she couldn't stand the tension.

"Look, do you want to get away from the castle for a bit? I'm meant to be collecting some apples from the orchard for Hilda. She wants to make lots of pies for supper. Would you like to join me? The fresh air might do you good?" She smiled that beautiful, radiant smile of hers. "Plus." She leaned towards him conspiratorially. "There won't be anyone around to stop us from eating one or two ourselves."

"Well, then I'm definitely in," Merlin said, finally cracking a smile.

He levered himself to his feet and brushed himself down before falling into step beside his friend. He'd missed this. In the past he and Gwen had spent so much time together but since she had fallen in love with Arthur they barely saw each other alone. It was nice. She was good company. They made their way down to the castle orchard laughing and joking about all sorts of stories and gossip they'd heard in the castle.

Once there, it fell to Merlin to climb the tree and pick the apples before throwing them down to Guinevere who placed them in her basket. Soon her arm ached from the weight of all the fruit they had collected and she had to put it down.

"Phew, I think that's enough, Merlin," she shouted up to her friend who was currently sitting at the very top of the gnarled apple tree happily munching away on a red apple.

"Alright. I'll be down in a moment…GWEN! Look out!"

Movement had caught his eye and he was appalled to see a group of men, perhaps bandits, melting out of the trees. They were all dressed in dark clothes and held a variety of fearsome looking weapons. They were headed straight for the young woman. Gwen had seen them now too and was desperately looking around for a weapon of some kind. All she found was the apple basket. Hefting it up she managed to swing it at the first man who approached her and knocked him off his feet. Apples flew everywhere. The second man was more prepared and walloped her on the arm with a club so she dropped the basket. Frantically she grabbed a few apples and threw them at the men. A couple found their target, acting like large solid bullets but soon she ran out of ammo. All she could do now was run. Hitching up her skirts she tried to move through the long grass but she couldn't go fast enough and they were soon upon her like a wolf pack upon a helpless deer.

"No, no, no!" she screamed, struggling for all she was worth, "Let go of me! No!"

Merlin who had seen what was happening had begun to scurry down the tree faster than a squirrel. Unfortunately, one of the bandits had spotted him and aimed his slingshot at the boy. A small hard rock hit Merlin on the side of the head and he gasped in pain, almost losing his grip. However, he managed to continue, practically sliding down the tree in his haste, ignoring the whips and painful poking from the unforgiving branches. The slingshot struck again, this time on his cheek and another on his hand. Yelping with pain and fear, Merlin felt himself fall. He plummeted to the ground and hit it with a sickening thud.

Gwen screamed again. "Merlin!"

To his credit, the boy tried to get up but was immediately kicked in the ribs for his trouble.

"Is this the boy?" one of the men asked the leader gruffly, thumping him again for good measure.

"Aha, luck must be on our side, Griffian. The girl called him Merlin. It must be him," the leader sneered.

"And she's definitely the girl?"

"Yeah, ugly little whelp that she is. Two for one. How perfect. Come on; let's get moving before we attract attention. Knock them both out."

Moments later Merlin and Gwen were aware of nothing as their limp bodies were dragged unceremoniously away.

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><p><strong>Duh, duh, duh. Review, please! <strong>


	3. Lost

**Edit: As if I just served Sir Percival in Boots! Aha! Unbelievable! Author's Note - Sorry for the long wait, my taplop broke down and then I had lots of work to do. Hopefully I'll get the next one up quicker but just bear with me! And thanks for the lovely reviews.**

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><p>The sun shone through Arthur's window casting a pool of light onto the desk he was writing on. The letter, barely two sentences long, was proving too much for the young king, especially as he had to write it with his left hand and so he threw the quill down and sat back in his chair in a huff. This was when he needed Merlin to write the rest of the letter for him but unfortunately, since the manservant had stropped off, Arthur hadn't seen him anywhere. Arthur imagined he was down at the tavern – again – drowning his so-called sorrows and bemoaning to all his drunken friends how mean the King of Camelot really was. He was such a little whiner. It was just a joke! Why did nobody understand that? Even the knights had frowned at him when he told them exactly what happened, hoping for their support. Leon had even had the audacity to tell him he was in the wrong. Arthur had not been pleased and decided not to apologise to Merlin at all after that because he was just too irritated at everyone's sudden sense of humour failure.<p>

Glaring at his scrawling, smudged hand-writing, Arthur slammed his fist on the table in frustration. Belatedly, he remembered that it was broken but by that time he was too late. A yowl of agonised anger escaped him. Just at that moment someone rapped on his door.

"Yes?" he bellowed, furiously.

He was in the process of swiping everything off his desk in his annoyance, listening with satisfaction as it crashed to the floor - including his entire ceramic ink pot - when he heard a small cough behind him. Spinning on the spot, he caught sight of a young serving boy.

"What?" Arthur snapped at him.

"My…my lord, you are needed urgently. Something's happened." The youth stumbled over his words and shifted awkwardly from one foot to the other under his king's intense gaze.

"What? What's happened?"

"Its….its urgent, sire. I don't know anything more than that," the messenger stuttered. "You are needed in the council chambers."

Sighing in irritation, Arthur headed for the door. However, before he left he gestured to the boy. "Clean this up, will you? My own stupid, lazy servant seems to have gone walkabout."

"Yes, sire!" The boy bowed very low and Arthur nodded with satisfaction.

Upon arriving at the council chambers Arthur was surprised to see a small gathering awaiting him. It composed of all of his knights, several of the kitchen staff – one of whom was holding a half empty basket of apples - and Agravaine.

"I hope this is good because I was writing a letter," the king stated, acerbically. "And it was damn good," he added, as if someone had suggested otherwise.

No one replied. They were all staring at him with varying expressions of apprehension.

"Well?" He clapped his hands together to encourage them, striding up the hall. "Does anyone in this room have a tongue?"

"Sire, I….I'm so sorry…." Sir Leon was the bravest and stepped forward to face his king but even he struggled to get the words out. Seeing his anxiety, Arthur slowed a little in his brashness.

"What is it? What's the matter?" Arthur queried, feeling a sense of foreboding building inside him. He didn't like those grave faces one bit.

"It's…" Leon choked on the second word.

Elyan stepped in. "Its Guinevere, my lord. She's…."

"Missing," Percival finished for his comrade.

Arthur's heart faltered. Once the words had truly sunk in, it then began to thump nauseatingly hard against his ribs. With each heavy beat he felt sicker and sicker and he felt a lump rise in his throat. Fiercely, he quelled the almost overwhelming need to vomit and attempted to regain his bearings after the initial shock. Even when he felt more in control, he could still hear his heartbeat reverberating in his head like a drum.

Ashen-faced, he managed a few words but even they were more like whooshes of breath. "When? How?"

"She was sent for apples, sire," Leon took up the thread of the story, "By Hilda here." He gestured to the narrow woman beside him. "When she didn't return from the orchard, Hilda sent someone looking. They found this scattered basket of apples….and signs of a struggle."

"Was there blood?" Arthur said with a little more strength. He couldn't afford to be weak where Guinevere was concerned.

Leon faltered but managed, "A little."

At the knight's reply, Arthur felt his resolve begin to crumble as hot, acidic bile threatened to scour his throat. He must have been an unpleasant shade of green because someone quickly offered him a chair. He fell into it gracelessly, fighting against his roiling guts.

"Anything else?" he questioned, eventually.

"No, my lord. We are already readying search parties."

"Good."

"And the knights and I will head out right away. Do you wish to come with us?"

"Of course," Arthur said, vehemently. He pushed the sick feeling away and forced himself to his feet, trying not to tremble. "We must find her before nightfall. I will not sleep until she is safely in bed."

"Yes, sire!" the knights chorused.

And so scores of men headed off into the darkening countryside whilst others scoured the villages for any sign of the king's lost love. They hunted for hours until they had to light torches in order to see a thing. All over Camelot pinpricks of firelight were dotted, illuminating exactly where all of King Arthur's men were. They didn't leave a house or shack unsearched. Arthur and his closest knights travelled through the dangerous forest until they ended up riding in fruitless circles. All of them were reminded, horribly, of the previous night when they were desperately trying to find Merlin. Somehow they knew this search would not end as well.

It was late into the night when Leon suggested returning to the castle for some sleep before resuming the search early tomorrow.

"The men are exhausted, sire," he said, tentatively.

"But Guinevere is _missing_, Leon," Arthur replied with a fierce tone – one brokering no argument. "She is probably hurt, in pain, scared…" With each word he spoke he felt his heart ache even more. "She could be…she could be dead." His face twisted in anguish at the thought. "But whatever the case may be, I will not rest until I find her."

"I understand, my lord." Leon bowed his head.

"You don't," Arthur replied, sharply, "Not until you love someone as much as I love Guinevere will you even be able to fathom how I'm feeling right now. I can't…I _will not_ leave her out here in the cold on her own."

"We are with you every step of the way, sire," Percival assured him, giving him a cautious squeeze on the shoulder.

"Thank you. Thank you everyone."

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><p>The morning dawned crisp and glittering with frost. Several birds battled to get one of the very last windfall apples left in the orchards this late in autumn as there was little hope of hunting for worms when the ground was so hard. Their sharp beaks weren't particularly forgiving and a few creatures were left rather ruffled and hungry. They would have to see if they were luckier at finding scraps in the village when the peasants began their daily business.<p>

At this early hour only the hardiest villagers were awake, forcing themselves out of bed, stoking their fires, filling their homes with warm smoke in an attempt to stave off the chilly bite of approaching winter. The world was generally quiet and subdued with only the occasional bark of a dog or caw of a bird breaking the tranquillity.

However, this peace was broken abruptly by the thunder of hooves as around one hundred knights and guards and general staff returned to Camelot Castle, exhausted and starving for a good, warm breakfast. Their faces were drawn and pallid, eyes circled with tiredness. Some were even falling asleep on their horses only to be rudely awakened by a prod from one of their neighbours. They looked like the living dead. Only King Arthur seemed bright-eyed and alert, urging his horse forward ahead of the group. Through the night, his fellows had observed how he was intensely focused and seemed to have a boundless, almost feverish, energy about him. They had all struggled to keep up. This morning they were only returning to regroup and eat before heading out again.

Despite his promise not to return until he found Guinevere, Arthur had conceded that he could not starve his men as that would be cruel and unfair after their hard work. Thus he allowed them a few hours respite. He doubted whether he himself would manage to eat anything because the underlying feeling of nausea was still present but a chance to consider his options would probably help. In the castle he may have a clearer head or further leads might come apparent. Plus, he could finally find his blasted manservant who seemed to have vanished into thin air – probably still nursing his wounds from the day before. Arthur couldn't believe Merlin would be so selfish as to desert Guinevere over a petty argument but perhaps he wasn't the man Arthur had believed him to be. The king would definitely be having angry words when he found the boy.

So lost was he in his thoughts that Arthur barely noticed they had reached the castle until they clattered into the courtyard. He was shaken awake by the racket and quickly dismounted, throwing his reins to a waiting stable-boy. Swiftly, he strode towards the front doors; just as he entered he spotted a servant.

"Oi, you, will you find Merlin for me and tell the witless wonder to meet me in my chambers immediately?"

"Yes, my lord," the servant agreed, nodding rapidly, "Erm…where will I find him?"

Arthur shot the servant a withering look. "How should I know? That's why I'm asking you, idiot."

"I'm sorry, sire," the young man looked contrite, his freckled cheeks flaming, and quickly hurried away.

After he had gone, Arthur dismissed his men and headed for his room. He would change his clothes into something clean and much warmer – for today was very cold and the wind was harsh – before heading to the council chambers to meet Agravaine and his other advisors and knights. Upon arriving in his room, he stripped off and searched around for an undershirt and thick over-garment. With his fire unlit, his room was icy and he didn't like to think about how much Gwen could be potentially suffering in the cold wherever she was. He just hoped she was holding on because he _would _find her.

Once dressed, Arthur waited a couple of minutes to see if Merlin would turn up. However, he soon grew impatient and headed to the council chambers, ranting under his breath about how unbelievably ignorant and lazy his manservant was. He was never around when the king needed him most. By this time, Arthur had assumed that the stupid boy had passed out down at the tavern and had yet to wake up from his drink induced coma. Undoubtedly, Merlin would eventually stumble back to the castle, bleary-eyed and terribly hung-over without a clue as to what was going on. It made Arthur angry just thinking about his obliviousness to Guinevere's danger.

Arriving in the towering council chambers, Arthur made a bee-line for his uncle because the man made him feel safer and more secure. He would know what to do next.

"Uncle, good morning," Arthur said with a nod.

"Good morning, sire," Agravaine bowed back. "It is good to see you safely returned though I must say you and your men seem exhausted. Perhaps it may be better for you all to rest through the day?"

Arthur looked surprised. "Certainly not, Uncle, every second counts where Guinevere is concerned. We must ride out as soon as everyone is fed and watered."

"Oh, if that is your wish, my lord," Agravaine replied, submissively. "May I ask what you intend to do? Continue scouring the countryside for this lost girl?"

"If that's what it takes then yes," Arthur stated, forcefully. "I will do anything for her. As long as it takes, I will search."

"Oh, I don't doubt your commitment to Gwen, sire, I just question your…judgement." Agravaine looked uncomfortable; his forehead was wrinkled with frown lines.

"My judgement?"

"Well, yes." The older man paused, as if considering his words carefully. "With this random, desperate searching you could be missing obvious clues. You could also be scaring the captors – if there are captors – away."

"What do you mean, _if _there are captors?"

"My lord," Agravaine seemed to struggle with his voice, as if it upset him to speak what he said next. "Could she not have run away? Just left the castle of her own accord? Eloped, even?"

"No!" Arthur shouted, immediately. His uncle flinched. "Sorry but don't doubt her character, Uncle. I mean she wouldn't have left without saying goodbye. She wouldn't have done that to me." He added, almost as if he was convincing himself.

"Of course, sire." Agravaine nodded in agreement but he knew he'd placed that seedling of doubt. That was good.

"But…" Arthur began, "You are right about the unplanned, reckless searching. I will…I will remain here." It pained the young man to say it but he choked back his dislike for doing nothing to help Gwen. "And I will send several disguised scouts out to see what they can find without being detected. That way maybe the abductors will be less prepared and less hidden if they believe we have given up the chase. Meanwhile, I will try and work out who would have taken Guinevere and why."

"Oh, but of course we know why, my lord," Agravaine half-snorted as if it were obvious as the light of day.

Arthur's head snapped up. He looked startled. "What? Why?"

"Well, because of her connection to you sire," Agravaine said, slowly, as if he were talking to a small, slow-witted child. "She is the lover…"

"We're not lovers."

"Well the sweetheart of the King of Camelot. She is a prime target for enemy kingdoms."

Arthur still looked surprised. "But we kept it quiet. Our relationship barely left these castle walls. How could they have even known to capture her?" His voice had become more distressed.

Agravaine offered him a sympathetic smile. "I'm afraid we'll probably never know the answer to that, my lord. What's done is done."

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><p>Marching furiously into the physician's chambers, Arthur even forgot to knock and therefore met a startled Gaius on the other side. The old man had been busy mixing a potion on a small flame and almost burnt his hand as he leapt in surprise at the abrupt entrance of his king.<p>

"My lord!" He stood, quickly. "What brings you here?"

"Where the _hell _is Merlin?" Arthur spat, annoyance radiating off him in waves.

"Merlin?" Gaius repeated, slowly, "Well, I have to say I thought he was with you. I haven't seen him since…yesterday, I guess."

Arthur frowned impatiently. "Ughh…are you aware of what's been going on in the castle, Gaius?"

"I heard that poor Guinevere was missing and that you had set out to look for her on horseback - _against _my medical advice, I might add. I assumed Merlin was with you."

"Well, he wasn't."

"Did you say Merlin was missing?" A voice piped up from the other side of the chambers.

Arthur spun around and saw his injured knight sitting, propped up against several pillows, on a bed. Although he was glad to see his friend was feeling better, he did not appreciate the inane interruption.

"No, I did not. Guinevere is missing, Gwaine, not Merlin."

"Oh, 'cos I was gonna say it made sense if Merlin was missing now."

A horribly familiar sense of foreboding filled Arthur's empty stomach once more. "Huh? What do you mean?"

"I was gonna tell you yesterday before all that funny potion you gave me," Gwaine replied, hastily, "But obviously I didn't get a chance."

"Spit it out, Gwaine."

"Well, those men that tried to take Merlin seemed pretty set on taking him in particular. They kept saying 'is this him? Is it him?' And I assumed they thought he was you 'cos you both _obviously _look so similar. But then they said, 'is it Merlin?' And well, yeah. They could have taken him again. They could have even taken Gwen, I suppose."

"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, GWAINE? How could you….why did you not tell me before?" Arthur roared in incredulous fury. He looked like he wanted to wring the other man's neck.

"Look, I'm really sorry but I had been stabbed, you know and..."

But Arthur had had enough. He stormed from the chambers, down the corridor and was violently sick in the stairwell. All this time he'd just assumed his best friend was being a useless waste of space when actually he was also in terrible danger. Arthur felt like a horse had just kicked the wind out of him and then someone had stolen his lungs before he could draw another breath. Feeling light-headed he leant against the hard stone wall and then slowly sunk down until he was slumped against it, his head between his knees.

"Gods, Merlin," he whispered, "I'm so sorry."

Arthur felt emptier and more alone than he ever had in his life.

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><p><strong>Next chapter will definitely feature Merlin and Guinevere, do not fear. :) But a review would definitely spur on the writer. <strong>


	4. The Choice

**Author's Note - Thanks for the reviews! They were fantastic. Sorry for the length between updates. I'm working and revising flat out at the moment!**

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><p>The first thing Merlin became aware of as he regained consciousness was the throbbing pain on the side of his head. It felt like he'd been kicked by a particularly angry horse. Groaning, he cracked his eyes open and found that he could barely see anything apart from a dim rock wall a few feet from his face. He didn't want to move but his hip was digging into the hard ground and his shoulder felt numb from lying on his side too long. Shifting awkwardly, he grunted and levered himself into a sitting position. As he did so he heard a clinking sound. Looking down he saw that his feet were manacled and anchored to the wall by a huge, dirty chain. Escape could be tricky then.<p>

The pain in his head had intensified with this more vertical position and he almost wanted to collapse again but he forced himself to focus on where he was. The ceiling was low and looked like it was also made of rock - so he was in a cave. A cave that smelt damp and rotten. Merlin's nose wrinkled in distaste and he tried to ignore the stench. Now was not the time to be bothered about trivial things like bad smells considering he had been abducted and was probably rather lucky to be alive.

Merlin caught a glimpse of a dark shape moving in the corner of his eye but when he turned to look there was nothing there. He shuddered uneasily.

Touching his temple, he vaguely remembered the vicious blow that one of the bandits inflicted upon him. His hand came away sticky and he assumed he was or had been bleeding. Two head wounds in two days. That had to be some kind of record. Arthur would definitely have made a joke about thick skulls and brain damage by now. That is… he would have made a joke if he had been actually present and if Merlin wasn't alone in some silent, stony tomb with no idea who had kidnapped him and how he was going to get out of this mess.

With a sudden, nauseating jolt he remembered he _shouldn't _be alone.

"_Gwen…" _he gasped, his voice hoarse with immediate, overwhelming concern. He tried to jump to his feet but found himself dropping painfully to his knees, constricted by the manacles. Hissing as he grazed the palms of his hands on the harsh rock beneath him, Merlin cursed his predicament.

Looking down at the heavy locks, he considered the use of magic. It would be easy. A quick spell and he would be free to escape and look for Gwen. However, he didn't know what he would find once he left this room. There could be anything and anyone beyond. If his escape was unsuccessful for whatever reason they would know his biggest most vulnerable secret. It could have terrible, terrible consequences if things went wrong.

_But _he couldn't just _sit _here on his backside.

"Ábéatan!" he whispered.

The chain snapped.

Almost instantly the boy was on his feet. It took him a moment to get his balance and shake the pins and needles after being on the floor for so long but once he had then he was off like one of Arthur's hunting dogs. The wide cave that he had been chained in narrowed into a winding passageway. He hurried along it, trying to school his breath so it didn't sound quite so deafening reverberating against the rock walls. However his breath was rather drowned out by the rushing of blood in his ears. Merlin felt certain that someone would hear him coming just because of how loudly his organs were working.

The tunnel curved slightly and he slowed his pace so he could peer around the corner before proceeding. He didn't want to barrel into his captors unprepared. So far he was quite surprised there hadn't been a guard or at least someone around to keep watch on the prisoners. He guessed that they didn't expect him to escape the heavy duty manacles considering he was merely a weak servant. That always worked to his advantage, he thought with a wry smirk.

Merlin came to a fork in the tunnel. He paused. Unsure of which path to take. Once again he summoned his magic to help him find his way. A golden haze shimmered into existence, directing him down the right hand passage. He could almost sense how close Gwen was, the tendrils of his magic seeking her out. He desperately wanted to call out but he knew that would be reckless considering anyone could be listening. Instead he quickened his pace.

Around the next corner he saw her.

She was lying in a similar cavern to the one he'd been left in though this one had a higher ceiling. From the looks of things she was still unconscious and Merlin scooted over to her for fear that her stillness could mean grave injury. Dropping to his knees, he couldn't help but think Arthur would _kill _him if he let anything happen to Guinevere. Come to think of it, he probably wouldn't be able to live with himself for not protecting his great friend more should she die. The thought was unbearable.

"Gwen….Gwen…." he whispered, softly. Then, when he received no response, he increased the volume and gently shook her. "Guinevere, wake up. Please, Gwen, please…" He shook her harder but still she didn't stir. His pulse quickened, fearing the worst.

"That won't help much," a callous voice sneered. "She's out cold."

Merlin whipped around and jumped to his feet, standing protectively in front of Gwen's prone form. He glared daggers at the person before him.

"Morgana," he hissed in anger. "I should have guessed."

Morgana snorted. "Oh _really_? You mean to suggest to me that you have a _brain_, Merlin? I highly doubt that." She paused, contemplating him with those cool green eyes. "Then again, you did manage to escape my bindings. Somewhat impressive... I guess I will have to make sure they are more _secure _in the future. Ásælan!"

Before Merlin could react something had ensnared his wrists and ankles, slamming him to the wall in the process. He struggled against them ferociously but they held him fast. These bindings were invisible and seemingly inescapable. He wasn't sure whether even his magic would work on them but he didn't want to risk trying and failing in front of Morgana. She would know _exactly _how to use such a secret against him. He could kiss any hope of ever being Arthur's closest friend and advisor in the high court of Albion goodbye.

Instead, he offered her his frostiest stare. She was the worst enemy he had ever encountered. Friend turned foe. And she seemed to have severed all ties, all bonds she ever had with any of them in favour of power, greed and dark magic. She was not the Morgana he had liked and respected anymore. She was a dark, evil stranger. A true witch. What's more, she seemed deluded in thinking that what she was doing was right, that she was helping others like herself when Merlin could clearly see that she was in this for her and selfish reasons alone. With her sister gone she was completely wild.

"What do you want with me, Morgana? With Gwen?" he said, gesturing his head to the injured girl. "Surely it's Arthur you want?"

"Oh yes, you are right Merlin," Morgana nodded, pacing slowly towards him. Her smirk was widening. "But you must see the bigger game. You and Gwen, here, are merely pieces on my chessboard. To capture the king you must take out his court and those who stand either side of him, protecting him, are the pieces I covet the most. To his left, stands the queen. That's her." Morgana looked down at Gwen with distaste, like associating the servant with the word queen made her want to vomit. "And to his right, the loyal bishop – advisor, friend, moral compass. That's you, Merlin."

"I'm no clergyman," Merlin snorted.

"It is merely a metaphor, Merlin. I forgot that that may be above your level of learning," Morgana replied, coldly. "In simple terms for your simple mind, the two people most important to Arthur are Gwen and _you_."

Merlin scoffed again.

"Yeah, right. Arthur cares about me less than one of his prize mares. You should have horse-napped one of them!" he joked. "Then again, a horse might be quite hard to hide. They _always _leave a trail of poo that _someone _– me – has to clean up…."

"Be quiet, fool," Morgana interrupted, obviously annoyed. Her eyes flashed red and Merlin let out a hiss of pain as she tightened the bindings around his wrists. It felt like his bones were being rubbed together. Tears sprung to his eyes.

"Please, stop," he grunted, desperately.

The self-satisfied smirk returned and Morgana decreased the intensity of her torture.

"Had enough?" she asked, pleasantly.

"Of your rubbish metaphors, yeah. They're giving me a headache," Merlin replied, glibly.

Morgana scowled again and her eyes flashed red.

Merlin let out a strangled yelp as a binding appeared around his neck, tightening just like the ones around his limbs.

"Alright, alright, I'm sorry!" he choked. "Stop."

"Good, I'm glad you understand your position now, Merlin. That is as my hostage."

"What are you going to do then?"

"I am going to destroy Arthur and Camelot for good."

"How?" Merlin persisted.

"By making him choose."

"Choose?"

"Between you and the lovely Guinevere here. He must choose who he wishes to save and I will set them free."

"Oh," Merlin frowned then shrugged. "Well, that's easy then; you might as well start digging my grave now then. Can it be by a lake? I like lakes. It will be more poetic that way..."

"Now, now, Merlin," Morgana smiled, her lips twisting in an unpleasant manner, "Don't give up just yet. You'd be surprised."

"Arthur doesn't surprise me," Merlin replied, wearily, "Ever. He's predictable as the sun rise."

"Well, what if one day the sun failed to rise…wouldn't that be a wonderfully new and different day for us all?"

Merlin took a moment to contemplate her. "You do realise how insane you sound, right, Morgana?"

"I am perfectly sound of mind," Morgana said a little too quickly and defensively back. "Now, hold your tongue."

"That may be difficult," Merlin replied, smartly, gesturing to his bound hands. "Anyway, how does your plan result in the downfall of Arthur and Camelot anyway? Seems to me like you're just giving him back what he loves to most: Gwen. Won't he just be happy and more prepared against you in the end?"

Morgana looked at him with an almost coy smile. "You shall see, Merlin, you shall see."

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><p>Arthur sat in the long grass, staring at the gnarled carcass of the apple tree. It stood silently in the windswept orchard, completely stripped of its fruit and leaves after the harvest. He'd inspected it earlier and had deduced from the badly snapped branches that someone had recently climbed it and fallen out. Perhaps Merlin, perhaps Gwen, it was impossible to tell. A witness had belatedly come forward and told him she had seen the pair head down to the orchard so he could only assume they had been together when they were taken. However, although he didn't know exactly what happened, in his head he had conjured up his own version of events in which Guinevere was on the ground collecting apples whilst Merlin climbed the tree to throw them down to her. He envisaged the abductors capturing Gwen and then Merlin coming to her rescue like the blundering buffoon he was – probably falling out of the tree in the process – only to be captured as well. That was probably why they had both been taken because he couldn't see a reason for anyone taking Merlin other than that he was there and in the way.<p>

Running his unbroken hand roughly through his hair, he cried out in frustration. The shout was extremely loud in the peaceful in meadows, scaring several birds out of their roosts. The flutter of wings filled the air. Arthur watched them go before hanging his head and grabbing his knees up to his chest as tightly as he could. Why couldn't he work out who had taken them? He didn't even know where to start. There seemed to be no clues, no trail to pick up. Whoever had taken them knew how to move without leaving a disturbance behind. Then again, they had left the basket as evidence. Was that an oversight? Or purposeful? He just didn't know. He had hundreds of questions and no answers.

In the end, he gave up his frustrated vigil on the apple tree and returned to the castle. It was growing dark and there was little more he could discover here.

* * *

><p>It was much later that night when the young king received some much needed news.<p>

"My lord, one of the scouts has returned," Sir Leon announced upon his arrival in the Great Hall.

Arthur looked up from where he was picking listlessly at his dinner. The pork was dry and stuck in his throat and the wine made him feel nauseous. Then again, everything made him feel nauseous at the moment.

"Has he news?"

"Yes, but he is with Gaius."

"Gaius? Why?" Arthur stood, instantly.

"He was rather badly beaten by a band of outlaws."

Arthur frowned. "Beaten?"

"Yes, sire. I believe they were the ones who gave him the news though."

"Take me to him," Arthur commanded, striding down the long hall towards his knight. Leon bowed swiftly and the two of them left the room, heading to Gaius' chambers.

A few minutes later they arrived outside the physician's quarters. Arthur knocked on the door but didn't give Gaius time to answer his perfunctory tap before he entered the room. Inside, the doctor was tending to a young man with a badly bruised face.

"Oh, evening, Arthur. Have you come to visit?" Sir Gwaine greeted him, sarcastically from his bed.

"No, I'm here to see him." The king gestured to the scout.

"Yeah, thought so," Gwaine sighed and tried to cross his arms. However he couldn't and hissed in pain as he pulled his stitches. He was completely fed up of being bedridden already. "Everyone seems to have forgotten I'm here after all."

Leon offered him an apologetic smile but Arthur totally ignored him because he was too focused on the boy sitting before him.

"What happened?" he asked, "And what do you know?"

The youngster still looked in shock. His brown eyes were wide like a doe caught in a hunter's firing line and his skin was pasty white beneath the mirage of cuts and bruises.

"Sire…"

"What do you know?" Arthur repeated, forcefully. He caught the boy on the shoulders.

"My lord," Gaius interrupted, stepping between them. "Calm down. He is in no fit state for this kind of interrogation."

"But this is about Merlin and Gwen, Gaius!" Arthur retorted, annoyed.

Gaius observed him with firm blue eyes. "I do realise that, sire, but he is still very unwell and doesn't deserve to be treated in such a rough manner. He has been through enough."

"Yes… of course… I'm sorry." Arthur stepped back, holding up his hands in apology. The physician nodded in satisfaction and returned to dressing the scout's numerous wounds.

"You may question him in an appropriately quiet manner." The king nodded, not even protesting against or commenting upon the fact that the older man was treating him like a child. He respected Gaius too much to question him. "You might want to start with his name."

Arthur let out a deep shuddering breath and then stopped, looking lost.

"His name is Jethro," Leon offered in a low whisper.

Arthur shot him a grateful smile. "Jethro, I'm sorry for what you had to go through but there are lives hanging in the balance and anything you could tell me would be great."

The boy stared back at him with those watery dark eyes. "They jumped me in the forest." He huffed in a heavy, pained breath. "They knew who I was even though I was disguised. I don't know how." He looked harrowed as he recalled the tale. "They beat me until I was barely awake. Then they said 'give the king this message…'"

"Yes? It's alright, Jethro. They can't hurt you again."

"They said that he must choose….choose between his lover and his best friend. Whoever he leaves behind…." Jethro gulped. "Dies."

Any hope, any excitement that Arthur had felt crumbled instantly. It was as if someone had just grabbed his heart in a fist and squeezed. Hard. The pain was intense and sudden. He couldn't breathe again.

All he could manage was a small, "No."


	5. Time is Ticking

**Author's Note - Sorry for length between updates. Will try and continue with this story. Thanks for reviews!**

* * *

><p>I will not choose!" Arthur declared as soon as he found his voice again and those most important to him had gathered in the council chambers for a meeting. "This is ridiculous. I am the King of Camelot and I will not be subjected to this foul manipulation."<p>

"I don't think you have a lot of choice, sire," Gaius said, quietly and a little dazed, from where he stood against a tall stone column. His colour was off-white and he looked like he might collapse at any moment. He was alone in his knowledge of both Guinevere's _and_ Merlin's importance and therefore he was feeling the gravity of the situation like a lead weight on his shoulders.

"You must save Gwen!" Sir Elyan exclaimed, stepping forward. He had been deeply upset since his sister's abduction and now there was a chance of getting her back – he would not miss it. "It is a simple choice, my lord! You love her. You want to marry her. So _save _her."

"Elyan! What about Merlin?" Gwaine interrupted. He had been instructed to sit for the entire meeting in a comfortable chair but he looked like he wanted to rise physically to Merlin's defence.

"He….he is a servant, Gwaine. He is a good man but he will understand Arthur's decision. He will see it is for the good of the kingdom."

"His life is worth just as much, Elyan," Gwaine retorted, fiercely. "He is a good friend to us all. You cannot write him off like that."

"But Gwen can't die!"

"She won't," Arthur intervened, swiftly, even though he was also in turmoil about the whole thing. Elyan nodded in satisfaction but then frowned as the king continued, "Neither of them will die. I will not allow it."

"But what can be done, sire?"

"I will offer myself in their place. Whoever has sent this message is obviously trying to hurt me and what better way to do that than to kill me?"

"You can't do that, sire," Gaius stepped forward, his tone firm. "Neither Gwen nor Merlin would want for you to sacrifice yourself to save them. You are much too important." It hurt him to say it because he loved Merlin so dearly but he knew that Arthur could not be allowed to continue down this reckless path. His life and continued reign as king of Camelot was paramount. Merlin knew that more than anyone and had and would continue to lay down his life for that goal.

"They are important too!" Arthur roared, his anger more directed at the situation than at Gaius. Still, it caused the elderly physician to flinch. The entire hall became silent. Arthur paused, looking pale. "I think I'm going to retire to my chambers to think on this matter further. Uncle, would you join me?" He directed the last question at Agravaine who had, thus far, being standing quietly in the corner. The dark-haired man nodded and the two of them left.

Gaius watched them go, his worry ever increasing.

* * *

><p>Blood had trickled down Merlin's temple and onto his cheek where it had dried and become terribly itchy. Frustratingly, he couldn't do anything about it because Morgana had left him bound to the wall with her magical chains. There he hung, suspended like a true prisoner, his wrists and arms aching. He swore if he was left there much longer then he would definitely dislocate his shoulders. Every so often he would wriggle in an attempt to remove some of the discomfort. However, that only had a small alleviating affect which usually only lasted for a few minutes before the dull ache returned. Panting with pain and exertion, he tried to focus on something else in order to distract himself. Unfortunately, the opposite wall wasn't particularly good company and, thus far, Gwen had yet to wake. Then again, at least she was spared from this stressful situation. He was still worried for her health though. He couldn't even check to see if she was in any danger because he couldn't get close. It wasn't that he hadn't tried. He had attempted to break Morgana's bonds but found that the spells he knew did not work on the invisible chains. He was truly trapped.<p>

A dark shape suddenly darted from one side of the cave to the other causing Merlin to jump, startled. He peered into the darkness but could see nothing. His heart started beating a little faster as he wondered what on earth could be lurking in the shadows. Craning his neck, he tried to look closer.

"Merlin?"

He jumped again but this time he felt relief flood him.

Gwen was awake and looking at him groggily with large brown eyes. Her hair was wild around her face and there was a large bruise on her cheek but she looked, for the most part, unharmed.

"Gwen!" The young man immediately felt a grin break out across his tired face despite their situation. "Nice to see you awake. How're you feeling?"

"I've been….better," she replied, slowly. She was still surveying the cave, gradually getting her bearings. "Where are we, Merlin? What's going on?"

"Ah…well," Merlin began, trying to figure out how best to explain things without frightening the handmaiden too much. "It would seem we have been kidnapped by Morgana."

"Morgana?" Gwen looked horror-struck. "What does she want with us? Ransom?"

"No…" Merlin paused. "I think it's more complicated than that. I haven't worked it out fully yet but I will. I mean I've got plenty of time to hang around and think about," he joked, gesturing to his current predicament.

Gwen obviously hadn't registered his bindings as she gasped and her hand flew to her mouth. "How… how are you… floating there?"

"Morgana," Merlin shrugged – well, tried to shrug as much as one could whilst hanging with sore shoulders. "She used magic."

"Oh, Merlin, can I get you down?" Gwen tried to climb to her feet but fell over almost immediately as she was tripped up by her own manacle. "Oh I'm stuck too."

"Yup," Merlin sighed, making a face. "It's a bit of a rubbish situation, to be honest."

"Just a bit."

The young woman slumped back onto the floor and rubbed her head in an attempt to soothe her racing mind. Panicked thoughts were already worming their way into every crevice of her brain and she could feel a headache forming.

"But Arthur will save us, surely?" she said, looking up at Merlin.

Merlin considered her for a few seconds, wondering whether to tell her of the situation. No. It would only upset her. Some inevitabilities were better left unsaid. She was going to be the one walking out of here alive and so she didn't need to worry about ifs and buts unnecessarily.

"'Course he will," the serving boy said, offering his friend a dazzling grin. "He's Arthur, after all."

* * *

><p>"Everything is going to plan, I take it?"<p>

"Yes, m'lady. Arthur is terribly distressed and I can see him spiralling very quickly into a very, very dark place."

Morgana smirked, maliciously. "Excellent."

"I almost feel sorry for him." Agravaine threw in, casually.

"How so?"

"Well, the state he has worked himself into over two mere servants. It's ludicrous, don't you agree? He's practically pulling his hair out as we speak. If it were me then I would say goodbye to the both of them and save myself the trouble. Friendships are fleeting and valueless. I often think I am better without them."

"Your heart is as cold as the blade of your sword, Agravaine. I am unsurprised that you have so few friends to speak of. I guess you can count yourself lucky that you should never be in a similar situation to Arthur. Am I among your valueless friends?"

"Why of course not, m'lady!" Agravaine spluttered, back-tracking quickly. "You are my most valuable ally and friend. I would choose you any day."

Morgana almost snorted at his slime-balling but she refrained, choosing instead to practically ignore him. "Of course you would," she said, flippantly before moving swiftly on to much more important matters. "Do you have any inkling of who Arthur will choose?"

"It is proving harder for him than I expected, my lady."

"In what way?"

"Well I assumed lust for the whelp would win outright over his friendship with the peasant boy but he seems almost equally attached to the two of them. He would rather sacrifice his own life than see either die."

"I thought as much," Morgana said with a sly smile, "He always was very loyal to Merlin, even in the early days. I would even go so far as to call them brothers; not by blood but there is a level of devotion they show to one another that one would not usually find between royalty and riffraff."

"Brothers. I can see that," Agravaine agreed with a slow nod.

Morgana ran her cold, pale fingers along the wood of her table before looking up at her companion. "Well," she paused, "we'll have to wait. Just like everyone else. And then we will all see who the golden King of Camelot chooses to survive whilst the other perishes."

"The anticipation is killing me, m'lady," Agravaine replied in a droll tone.

* * *

><p>The night was slowly giving way to day so he found himself watching the watery sun rise in the east, casting a faint orange glow across the land. Camelot was beautiful.<p>

Arthur stood on the battlements, staring out at his kingdom – the kingdom he had thought he cherished above all else – and considered whether he would give it up for his friends. The answer was yes, he now realised, he would surrender Camelot in a heartbeat; just like he would give up his own life for Merlin or Gwen. They were so precious to him in a world where he had so many enemies and so few true friends.

Arthur closed his eyes for a moment and willed himself to see a way out of this predicament. There _had _to be a way.

He tried to imagine a world without Merlin and he felt his heart ache so painfully that he became light-headed but then he tried to imagine a future without Gwen and he felt similarly nauseous. There was just no future in this kingdom for him without either one of them. No matter who he chose, there would be someone he left behind and he would always, _always _live with the grief of that. He knew this is what the captor – whoever this evil creature was – had wanted. They had envisaged a scenario where the King of Camelot would be truly broken; an irreparable figure on the throne that he would definitely no longer want. They would win any war they waged upon him.

There was no way he could even contemplate making the decision. This wasn't like giving up a piece of land or a good hunting hound or even a prize mare. This was a human being who he cared deeply about. He loved them both. Arthur was certain of that. But who did he love more? His best friend or his sweetheart?

Angrily, he thumped his injured fist on the hard rock of the castle wall and felt a jolt of pain shoot through his forearm to his elbow. It hurt but it was also a release; something else to focus on in this stressful time.

"I don't think Gaius would appreciate that kind of strenuous activity," a voice sounded from behind him.

For a moment, Arthur almost believed it was Merlin. It was the tone of the words, the gentle mocking. And Merlin would always be the one to come keep him company, to surreptitiously comfort him in times of need. But he knew he was being stupid, it couldn't be Merlin – he was rotting in some prison somewhere – besides, it didn't even sound like his manservant. No, he knew who it was.

Without turning around, he waited for his new companion to take a few steps forward until he was beside him. Only then did Arthur turn his head slightly but he still didn't make eye contact.

"Nice sunrise," Gwaine said, affably.

Arthur said nothing.

"I think it's pretty great up here when you want to think about stuff 'cos it's quiet and it…well, I think it puts everything into perspective, don't you? 'Cos you can see the whole kingdom."

Arthur bit back a comment about it not being quiet now.

Gwaine was silent for a couple of minutes, merely content with standing next to his king.

Then he broke the peace. "You eaten anything since they went missing?"

Almost imperceptibly, Arthur shook his head. "Didn't feel like it," he muttered. His voice sounded strange and small – no where near as commanding as it usually was. He just felt utterly drained.

"You should probably eat something. In case you keel over or something," Gwaine suggested, matter-of-factly.

"Probably," Arthur agreed, but made no move to do anything about his current starved state.

"We'll find them before you have to choose, Arthur," Gwaine said, softly, touching his friend's arm. "We're the good guys. We have to win."

"This isn't about winning, Gwaine," Arthur replied, dully, "This is about salvaging what you can. They've already won – whoever _they _are. You see, I don't even know that. I can't even start looking because I have no clues. I'm just…. I've lost already Gwaine."

"Don't say that, my lord. You're Arthur Pendragon, King of Camelot: undefeatable, brave, and intelligent." Gwaine shook his shoulder now, trying to ignite some spark within his depressed ruler. "Use that intelligence now, sire. Who would want to hurt you? Who would have the intimate knowledge to hurt you this badly, this deeply? I have to say I don't think this is the work of your average war lord. In fact, I think it must be someone who knows you, Merlin and Guinevere very well."

"But I have no idea who that could be," Arthur said, despairingly.

"Well," Gwaine paused, "You better bloody well think harder then because we've had another message."

"And?" Arthur spun to face him, his eyes full of panic.

"You must make your decision by nightfall."


	6. Nightfall

**Author's Note - Thanks for the lovely reviews. I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

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><p>Hot pain throbbed in Merlin's shoulders to the point where it was almost unbearable – like someone had lit a fire beneath his skin. The agony must have shown in the creases of his face because Gwen kept asking him how he was doing and whether he was in much pain. Although it had been sweet and comforting at first, it was now becoming almost irritating because the pain would not be alleviated by her words and he just wanted to cry out but her presence and the fear of upsetting her made him refrain. Instead he had to grit his teeth and fight back the salty tears that made his eyes shine like pools of water in the flickering torchlight of the cavern.<p>

"Merlin," Guinevere's voice broke through the mantra he had been repeating in his head in an effort to forget the hurt. He almost hissed in anger but the kindness in him won out.

"Yes, Gwen?"

"I'm afraid."

The young manservant looked down at her, his face sympathetic. It didn't surprise him that the normally brave Gwen was nervous. This was a frightening, hopeless situation.

"I know this is scary Gwen but I promise I won't let you get hurt and then Arthur will sort it out and you'll… _we'll_ be fine."

Fortunately the girl didn't notice his slip-up; she was too focused on the stone wall to the left of Merlin. He was bound fast so he could not turn his head to look. Her eyes were as wide as dinner plates.

"What? What is it?" Merlin asked, urgently, feeling his heart beat faster.

"There's…. there's…. something on the wall," she whispered, almost inaudibly. Merlin had to strain to hear her.

"What?"

Gwen was quiet for a moment. "I don't know. It's just…. It's a shadow."

At her words, Merlin immediately felt the tension dissipate for him. It was merely a shadow; just a creepy shadow that had prickled Gwen's already taut nerves. His heartbeat slowed.

"You scared me for a minute there, Gwen," he sighed, his breathing still a little on the heavy, panicked side.

"But there's nothing to make the shadow, Merlin," the handmaid replied. Her words were chilling.

It took Merlin just a few short moments to glance around the room and see that she was indeed right. There wasn't a single object in the room that would cast a shadow on the wall. He felt his blood run cold, especially as Guinevere started backing away from whatever sinister shape was on the rock.

"What…." He gulped before continuing. "What does it look like?"

There was a pause, enough of a pause for him to hear his own heart slam against his ribs once, twice, three times.

"It looks like a monster."

* * *

><p>Arthur had sent out more search parties, he'd sent messengers into all the villages and towns, telling them to look out for the missing servants. He'd even sent several messages to neighbouring kingdoms to ask if they had anything to do with the abductions. It was all very risky as it highlighted his weaknesses and also gave his enemies the chance to manipulate him – as Agravaine had pointed out – but, at this point, he sincerely did not care in the slightest. Lives were in the balance and he was not prepared for the balance to tip the wrong way.<p>

So far, he had several messages back but none of them had been fruitful. A few villagers had believed they'd seen a boy of Merlin's description riding a donkey through a cornfield whilst others reckoned that they'd seen a young couple eloping into the woods. That had actually made the depressed king laugh. Merlin and Guinevere elope? What nonsense!

He had also sent Sir Leon, Sir Percival and Sir Elyan out in an attempt to track down the bandits who had attacked Jethro but so far they had not returned.

"Sire. I have a message for you!" A youth scurried up to him, his head bowed so low that he could probably barely see where he was going. Arthur wandered whether he would run straight into his lap. Fortunately, the boy stopped in front of the throne chair just in time.

"Yes?"

"There is another witness but he will only meet with you outside."

"Tell him he will meet the king where the king wants him to meet." By now Arthur was in a foul mood.

"Oh, well he is not here, sire. He sent his own squire."

Arthur frowned, tapping the wooden arm of his chair. "So he sent his message via his own man, via you to get to me? What a waste of time."

The boy had no reply to that so he remained silent, waiting and hoping he would not be punished.

Arthur surveyed the servant and considered his options. He could be an arrogant prat – as Merlin so like to call him – and sit here, refusing to move until his subject came to him or – considering the short amount of time he had left – he could put aside his loftiness and give the witness what he wanted. Considering the audaciousness of the request, he guessed it was probably worth his time.

"Oh, alright fine. Though this better be worth it. Where does this fellow want me to meet him?"

The boy gulped. "The woods, my lord. You are to follow his servant."

Arthur had to refrain was spluttering in indignation. Somehow, he managed it. Instead, he merely nodded his head and then sent the youth to fetch the other messenger. Moments later, they reappeared. His servant was supporting the man with him by the elbow, guiding him through the door.

"He's blind, my lord," the boy explained, hastily.

"Oh, well that's just great," Arthur scowled.

* * *

><p>Surprisingly, the blind man – who had introduced himself as Broc – was rather adept at making his way through the forest. He seemed to sense where obstacles where and moved as if he had full sight, slipping like a ghost through the trees. Arthur actually found it hard to keep up.<p>

"My master is just through these trees, my lord," he kept repeating, as if reassuring Arthur that he wasn't just leading him further and further into the depths of the wood for no reason. In fact, that thought had crossed Arthur's mind, that this could be a trap. However, he reckoned if he was prepared for anything then he would be fine. Besides, it wouldn't take much to overpower a disabled man.

"Just a bit further, sire," Broc promised, skirting around a fallen tree.

Arthur could only watch in admiration at his mobility. He wondered whether this blind outcast lived in these woods all the time. He seemed to be adapted to his surroundings.

A few minutes later they broke through the tree line into a large clearing. The grass was longer here, having had more sunlight, and grew almost to Arthur's knees. He glanced around him, looking for any signs of life. There wasn't a living thing in sight. Well, except for a large owl that sat in a nearby oak, staring at him gloomily. It blinked slowly, deemed him boring, and then turned to focus on something more exciting.

It didn't have to wait long.

The noise was like nothing Arthur had ever heard before and he had to throw his hands over his ears, deafened. His pulse quickened when he saw the grass around him ripple in a wind that seemed to have come from nowhere. Immediately, the king was on high alert, surveying the clearing for any sign of danger. However, he didn't think to look up.

A second before it landed, Arthur realised it was there and he almost jumped out of his skin.

Claws the size of lances. Feet like small boats. Scaled brown trunks for legs. Spines curving down its enormous body. Smoke billowing from its cavernous nostrils.

"Dragon…" Arthur gasped.

"Good afternoon, Arthur Pendragon," the dragon said, calmly, his lips moving to reveal rows and rows of sharp white teeth. "My name is Kilgharrah."

It was almost enough to stop the young monarch's heart from beating. The creature could speak. And politely! Struggling to squeeze air into his constricted lungs, he only managed to pant in response.

"Are you alright there, Arthur?" the dragon asked, concernedly.

"You're dead. I killed you," Arthur finally managed.

The dragon considered him for a moment before replying genially, "Well I have to say that it seems like I'm very much alive. I certainly feel alive though I suppose I _could _be mistaken."

Arthur gawped. "But you can talk."

"Ah yes, well I would have told you before but I'm sorry to say last time we met it was under very unfortunate circumstances and we didn't have much time for niceties. I wasn't quite myself, you understand. I was a little put out after being held prisoner for so long in your dungeon but I am not one to hold a grudge, young king, especially as you were not the one to imprison me. I was hoping we could start afresh."

"I….I…." Arthur choked, "But you're a creature of magic."

"True, I am a creature of the Old Religion and I _am _so very old now, Arthur but I mean you no harm. In fact, I swore my unfaltering allegiance to you well before you were conceived."

Arthur stared confusedly back at the hulking creature with its thick armoured hide and its huge talons that looked like they could garrotte a man in milliseconds. Then his gaze travelled up to that almost humanoid face, the wide, warm eyes and he found himself struggling the two parts of the dragon. Why would a creature such as this pledge allegiance to him?

"You are wondering why I would want to be your ally?"

Arthur nodded mutely.

"Your ruling of Camelot was foretold in a prophecy. You will be the Greatest King of All Time. You will unite the lands of Albion and bring peace among everyone. Your reign will be a golden era in history. You are King Arthur."

"Well I know my own name," Arthur muttered, sarcastically.

Kilgharrah rumbled and Arthur realised he was laughing. "Ah, so you've found your voice now have you, young king? Do you believe that you are fated to be the Greatest King that has ever lived?" The creature surveyed him with those big amber eyes that almost twinkled with something akin to amusement.

"No...no I don't think so."

"Well neither do I," the dragon agreed, simply.

"Hang on…"

"_Unless _you choose to save your manservant."

"Huh? What? My manservant? How do you know about Merlin? How does a _dragon _know anything about my affairs, in fact?"

"I have my ways," the creature replied, knowingly, "But my point is that you must save Merlin. That boy is essential to the prophecy. Without him you will not become King of Albion, you probably won't even stay King of Camelot."

"Hey, hold up, hold up…." Arthur held up his hands, disbelieving of the dragon's words. "How has _Mer_lin got any say over whether I'm king or not?"

"He has brought you this far," the dragon answered, cryptically, his leathery lips twisting into a strange reptilian smile. "But it is not my place to say any more."

"What?" Arthur asked, completely confused. Suddenly, he regained his footing and shook his head, fiercely, in an effort to remind himself about his earlier realisation. "Well, any way, what if I don't care about being king or uniting Albion or being the greatest king of whatever, whenever. What if I'd gladly give up Camelot for their lives?"

"Then you would break the prophecy and the fate of the land would be given to those with darker intentions than you could possible imagine," the dragon replied, gravely. "Camelot, Albion, all would be lost. Your people would suffer excruciating deaths at the hands of creatures that you think only belong in your nightmares."

"But I don't want to lose Merlin or Guinevere." Arthur spoke quietly and barely even registered he was baring his soul to a magical dragon – a creature that his father had vowed to wipe out. "They are the two people in this world who mean most to me. I…. I can't condemn one to death even if you think the fates have already decided everything. I don't have it in me."

"Well, find the strength, young king, because I can tell you one thing," the creature paused, "Merlin would never betray you. He is intrinsically good. You will never find a better man of purer heart and he would lay down his life for you in an instant – as he has many a time before. He is your protector, advisor and your brother in everything but flesh. Guinevere, on the other hand, has a dark malignancy in her soul and she will break your heart. In fact, she has already betrayed you."

"What?"

"She loves another. She will marry you but she will lay with another and she will bear you no children because of this betrayal. I am sorry but you would do better to change this path of misery you are headed down. It will bring you no happiness and she will only lead to your downfall."

With that, the dragon leapt into the air and took off, leaving Arthur reeling in his wake.

* * *

><p>"Stay calm, Gwen," Merlin said in a slow whisper. "Don't move and maybe it won't harm us."<p>

"And 'maybe it won't harm us'? Charming! You make me sound like a wild dog that might bite. In case you hadn't noticed I have no teeth!"

The two friends froze on the spot, their eyes met and they both looked as astounded as each other.

Suddenly the dark shape moved to the opposite wall and now Merlin too could see the shadow on the rock. It looked vaguely humanoid but there was a definite abnormality to its outline. Merlin could see why Gwen had called it a monster.

"I don't even know why you think I'm scary. I'm a shadow. I can't hurt anyone! For one thing I've got no arms. I'm an 'arm-less fellow me…. Get it?" The shadow chortled to himself as neither of his companions seemed to find the joke funny.

"You've got no mouth either, though," Merlin pointed out, "So how are you talking?"

"Magic!" the shadow piped back in a sing-song voice.

"Have you been here this whole time?" Gwen asked, finding her voice.

"Nah, I've been wandering around the lower caves. I didn't realise we had visitors. It's nice to meet you now though. My name is Terra."

"Terra…. What are you?" Merlin asked, utterly intrigued by the talking shadow.

"I'm a shadow," Terra replied, matter-of-factly.

"Not a ghost or a spirit?"

"Nope."

"How were you made?"

"Couple hundred years ago some ol' batty witch conjured me up for company. She was a very nice ol' girl but she definitely was a few newts short of a "I'm still right in the head" potion. I've been here ever since. Had a few visitors. Most don't stay. I just hang around on my own."

"So you don't really have much point now then?" Merlin asked, bluntly.

"Merlin!" Gwen admonished immediately, aghast by his rudeness.

If a shadow could have shown emotions then Terra probably would have looked rather offended.

"No, I guess not," he replied, huffily, "Shadows have a rather narrow job niche."

"I'm sorry, that came out wrong, Terra. I just meant that you're free to do as you please. You have no master?"

The shadow rippled, as if he were shuddering.

"Oh I have a mistress alright," Terra breathed, "And if I'm not mistaken, here she comes now."

Morgana swept down the stone corridor and into the cavern. She took a moment to gaze distastefully upon her two prisoners before she spotted Terra.

"Ah, Shady, there you are. I have a job for you. Come."

Terra bowed his head and followed her from the room.

* * *

><p>Arthur stared at the messenger that Morgana had sent. He wasn't exactly sure what it was but he knew for certain that he could not capture or threaten or follow it because the creature was a shadow, a dark shape on a pale rock. It could speak. How? He did not know for it had no visible mouth but it was prepared to take his message.<p>

"Have you made your decision, young king?"

Arthur nodded, struggling to find his voice. With these few words he would be condemning one of his loved ones to death. His heartbeat quickened, blood rushed to his head and he felt faint.

"And what would that be?" the creature persisted.

Quieter than a mouse, the King of Camelot whispered the hardest words he would ever have to say and then slumped to his knees, dropping his head into his hands as he cried. Wetness dribbled down his cheeks. By the time he looked up again, the shadow had vanished.

* * *

><p>"Lady Morgana, the king has given me his answer," Terra said, softly, appearing by her hearth.<p>

"And?" the witch asked, eagerly, rising from her seat.

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><p><strong>Duh duh duuuuuuuhh... Review and I may find it in me to tell ya what happens next. <strong>


	7. Betrayal of the Worst Kind

**Author's Note - Terribly, terribly sorry for the length between updates. I have been skiing. Hope you enjoyed the last chapter and thanks for the reviews.**

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><p>"Good evening, Guinevere. You're coming with me."<p>

Morgana had breezed into the cavern with a look of calculated triumph on her face. Her dark green eyes were full of excitement as strode over to Gwen. The handmaiden couldn't help but cower a little from this formidable vision in black. With one golden flash of Morgana's eyes, the chains burst off Gwen's legs and she was free. Well, she was free until she was grabbed roughly by the arm and dragged to her feet.

"No," Gwen muttered, fearfully, "Let me go! Help me, Merlin!" She turned to him with desperate brown eyes, willing him to save her.

Merlin struggled fruitlessly against his own bonds but could only watch with anxiety filling his every pore.

"Let her go, Morgana!" he yelled. "Or I swear to god, I'll…."

Crying out in anger, Merlin tried to rip his arms from their sockets but the pain was agonising and he had to stop. Breathing heavily, he looked up but both Gwen and Morgana had vanished. His heart dropped to his stomach. He was too late.

* * *

><p>A vision of bedraggled beauty emerged from the trees, stumbling over roots and squinting in the bright morning sun. It had taken Morgana all night to finally release her prisoner and Arthur had spent the longest, most painful time of his life pacing between the crooked oaks in the eerie darkness, desperately contemplating whether he had made the right decision. As Guinevere staggered towards him like a newborn animal, her eyes aglow at the sight of him, Arthur instantly knew that he'd made the right choice – not because of what the dragon had told him – but because of what he was feeling now. The overwhelming sickness that took hold of him when he realised that the <em>wrong<em> person was standing before him. He'd been tricked.

"Oh Arthur!" Gwen cried out in joy, sprinting the last couple of steps and leaping into his arms. He caught her weakly, almost unable to look her in the eye. He had condemned this woman to death just hours ago… and yet, here she was, encircled in his arms.

"Gwen?" he whispered her name but it was more of a question than an expression of relief and joy as hers was.

"I thought….I thought…." She was crying now, choking on her words. "I thought that you would save us. Merlin thought so too but he's still in there. Morgana let me go… why did she let me go?" Guinevere came up for air, confusion twisting her pretty features.

Arthur was at a loss for words.

However, he regained his focus by the mention of her name. The name of his sister.

"Morgana? Morgana is behind this?" He found his voice and he was furious.

"Yes, did you not know?" Gwen asked, tears still dribbling down her smooth cheeks. Usually Arthur would have wiped them gently away with the crook of his finger but he was too angry and hurt and betrayed by that fact that a woman who he had grown up with and loved could have concocted this heartless plan…. and then twisted it just at the last moment in the cruellest manner possible. Now he had a woman he had betrayed safely in his grip and his best friend was still trapped, slipping further from his grasp. This was almost worse than before. He had failed them both.

"I didn't," he growled through gritted teeth. Suddenly he let go of Gwen and leapt forward. "Can you take me to where you were held?" His tone was demanding, panicked.

Gwen looked heartbroken. "No." Her face was contorted with grief. "I… I don't know because I was blindfolded. It was a cave…. Underground… but I…. I don't know," she finished meekly.

"Damn!" Arthur cursed. "Anything else? Anything at all?" As he quizzed her, desperation seeped into his voice. He was on the verge of losing the best friend he'd ever had and there was nothing he could do.

"I'm sorry, Arthur, I don't…" Gwen was crying now, the sobs hitching in her throat. She reached out for him for comfort but Arthur moved away, headed in the direction where Guinevere had come from. It seemed cruel to deprive her of his reassurance after her ordeal but he could not focus on her when she was safe and Merlin was fighting for his life.

"Stay here, Gwen. Stay safe."

He caught her dark eyes in his stormy blue ones and for a moment there was a familiar feeling of love but then he was gone and, depending on how this panned out, that could be the last time they shared such a look.

* * *

><p>"Where the hell is she, Morgana? What have you done to her?" Merlin roared, immediately, as the witch re-entered the cavern. His eyes were full of fierce protectiveness.<p>

"She's gone, Merlin." Morgana's lip curled a little.

"Gone? You killed her?" Merlin felt like he'd been punched in the gut – all the air whooshed from his lungs.

Morgana shook her head and chuckled. "No, Merlin. I let her go."

"You…" Merlin looked confused, his brow furrowing. "You let her go?" He had to repeat the words because he couldn't quite believe them.

"I kept up my end of the deal," Morgana replied, simply. Her green eyes searched his for a reaction. "I asked Arthur to choose. He chose Gwen."

For a moment, Merlin didn't know what to feel. He knew this had been coming so it wasn't shock or indignation or anything like that. He didn't feel angry. No, he couldn't be angry when Arthur had done the right thing and saved the woman he cherished above all else. Guinevere deserved to live a long, happy life after all. And he didn't feel grief that was he was about to die at the hands of the woman he now despised most in the world. He just felt… empty. Meaningless.

"Oh," was all he could manage. Merlin found his previous bravado had now left him. All he could focus on now was the burning pain in his shoulders and his imminent death. They weren't really great fuel for bravado.

"Oh indeed. I won't kill you just yet though, my dear Merlin. First, I have to wait for my audience to arrive and then… then I will kill you… with pleasure."

With that, she swept from the cave, her long dress billowing behind her. Merlin watched her go and realised the next time he was in her company, he would die.

He felt a couple of warm, salty tears dribble down his pale cheeks. It was over.

"Chin up, young fellow."

Merlin's neck snapped up and he spotted Terra on the opposite wall. The shadow seemed to be sitting down mid-air or at least leaning on some invisible surface. As Merlin tried to focus on where the creature's eyes should be, Terra moved again until he was right beside the hanging warlock. Merlin could just about see the dark shape out of the corner of his eye.

"What are you doing here?" the youth asked, feeling embarrassed at the vulnerable state he was in. He couldn't even wipe away his tears with a rough palm.

"I came to keep a dying man company," Terra replied, soberly. "It can't be nice to face death all on your own."

"I have to say I've been in nicer situations," Merlin agreed, "But then I have been in worse."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I have had my fair share of scrapes with death. I suppose it would have happened like this sooner or later."

"You sound like a hardened soldier."

Merlin snorted. "No, more like an underpaid, underappreciated manservant." He offered the shadow a watery smile. "I'm servant to the King of Camelot."

"Wow," Terra said, "I wouldn't have thought that would require many life or death situations."

Merlin chuckled again, a little darkly. "You'd be surprised. Manservant/bodyguard – the title's pretty interchangeable when it comes to Arthur."

As he thought of his friend, Merlin felt his throat constrict painfully and he had to squeeze his eyes shut for a moment. A fresh wave of tears seeped down his face. He had done everything for Arthur and he had thought that they were closer than they ever had been… but it was not enough. And he shouldn't be surprised about that. Although it twisted his gut to admit it, he knew that Arthur meant more to him than he did to Arthur. But he couldn't condemn Arthur for saving the woman he loved. Merlin was just his manservant who happened to be a relatively good friend.

"But surely the King of Camelot can protect himself?" Terra questioned.

"Not against magic," Merlin answered, softly. "And when I'm gone I have no idea who will protect him against Morgana. She has become more powerful than I could even have imagined." Deep, worried frown lines marred his smooth young face. "I should have killed her when I had the chance but…. I just….well I couldn't. She was my friend after all."

"Friend?" Terra's tone was full of surprise. "I wouldn't have thought that nasty creation had a single friend. Well, apart from that scumbag Agravaine."

"I suppose I shouldn't be surprised he's involved in all this," Merlin sighed, resignedly, "But before him and before she discovered her magic Morgana was…. well, she was good. She cared for the people. She almost killed herself trying to save a little boy. She's…. she's just made a lot of bad decisions and ended up in a place where she has no friends – as you say – and can see no way out except through violence and bloodshed. She would never have done this to Gwen and I before she became corrupted by dark magic."

"That's an interesting insight into such an evil and formidable witch," the shadow said after a moment's pause. "But I don't think she has any loyalty to you now, Merlin."

Merlin hung his head. "No. I have betrayed her far too many times. I just wish that I hadn't listened to Gaius in the beginning. I wish I'd told her about my magic and helped her when she first discovered hers. Then maybe we would all be walking an entirely different path."

The shadow seemed to stiffen abruptly. Merlin looked up and although he could not make out Terra's face, he knew that he was suddenly very tense and uncomfortable. Something in Merlin's words had stressed him.

"Terra, what's wrong?"

At first Terra said nothing but, after a few minutes, the creature spoke. "You have magic also?"

"Oh, yes. I didn't mention that before did I? Sorry," Merlin mumbled. "That's my _big _secret," he added sarcastically, "Not that it matters much anymore."

"You should not have told me young warlock. If Morgana bid it then she could enchant that kind of information from me. I am her slave. I will do my best to keep it from her though."

"Terra, she can't really do much with what I have told you. She has already decided to kill me. She has already defeated my spirit by making Arthur choose Gwen over me. I have nothing left to fear."

"But you have magic, Merlin. Surely you can escape?"

Merlin heaved a deep, beaten breath. "Trust me, I've tried. These bindings are unbreakable."

"Well, you'll just have to try harder. And I will help!"

* * *

><p>Morgana stared into the flames of her hearth and waited for Agravaine to arrive. He was running late and she was not amused. He had begged her to allow him to be present when they killed the leftover victim and she was keeping up her end of the promise but he was definitely stretching her patience. There seemed to be no explanation for his tardiness considering he did not have to hover around Arthur, comforting and reassuring him, as the King had already made his decision. Then what was he doing?<p>

If she had to wait much longer then Morgana would just do the deed alone. Witches did not wait for feeble men.

As she considered this, Morgana tried to decide how best to kill the irksome manservant. She was weighing up what would cause her the most satisfaction. Torture? Burning? Execution by magic? Then he could behold how truly powerful she was. He had tried to kill her before and she would relish this opportunity to show him just what an enemy he had made.

Closing her eyes, she began to imagine the fear and pain that would soon be in his expression. That was rather satisfying in itself and she contented herself with her vivid dreams as she waited.

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><p>"Uncle! Good god, what are you doing out here?" Arthur asked as he tumbled through yet another thicket and found his uncle sat astride his dark horse.<p>

"Arthur?" Agravaine's eyes widened in shock, momentarily, before he recollected himself. "I came to find you of course, nephew! I understand you have made the decision." His beetle black eyes skirted around the younger man. "But I see no evidence of either your manservant or maidservant?"

"I..." Arthur felt his stomach curl. "I have Guinevere. She is safe."

Agravaine gave him a peculiar look and then shook his head. "Ah, so you are headed home?"

"No, I am going to save Merlin."

"Alone?"

"Yes, sir."

"Well that is no longer the case. I will make sure you stay... alive."

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><p><strong>Yes, I will always choose Merlin over Gwen guys. I'm sorry. He's just a much better and nicer character. :)<strong>


	8. A True Soldier

**Author's Note - Sorry for the really, really, really bad updating. I will try and finish this story but I'm definitely taking my sweet time about it. Thanks for sticking by me guys. **

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><p>Agravaine wanted to kill Arthur. He was just there. Sickeningly vulnerable. No idea that his uncle was plotting a thousand different methods of killing him in his head. An itchy hand rested on the hilt of the dagger concealed beneath his cloak. It would be so <em>easy. <em>A single smooth movement and Arthur would have a blade in his back and the kingdom of Camelot would be theirs!

But no. That was not Morgana's plan. Her plan was crueller, more complex and – as she continuously pointed out – obviously too intellectual for Agravaine to comprehend. Although her taunting words jarred him, Agravaine could not allow himself to become angry with the woman that he revered above all else. It had started with a simple matter of attraction - she was, of course, a stunning woman – but he had witnessed her beauty and her intelligence and her lust for power and he was soon completely besotted. Now he would do anything to make her his queen.

Therefore, no matter how simple easy it would be to run Arthur through right now, he could not do it.

"Uncle?"

Agravaine jumped, shaken from his murderous thoughts, by the sharp question of his nephew.

"Arthur?" he replied.

"Are you with me?"

"All the way, sire." Agravaine nodded firmly to punctuate his words.

Arthur offered him a strange look. "I meant in terms of being alert but I guess that's good to know." A small amused smile quirked his lips and he shook his head before walking on through the forest.

Agravaine watched him go and cursed his inability to do anything.

* * *

><p>"You do know what you're doing, right?"<p>

"Of course I do, warlock. Stop being a worrywart."

"But you don't look like you know…"

"I know!"

"Do you mean you know what you're doing or you know you don't look like you know what you're doing?"

"What?"

"I said…"

"Look, just be _quiet_," Terra hissed and then flexed his shadow muscles. "Let the master work. **Ábéatan!"**

"I've tried that."

"Oh. Well, you could have told me."

"You didn't ask."

"Hmmph. Fine. I'll try this. Ádón!" The chains fizzled but did not break. Terra growled in frustration. "Bloody magic," he lamented with a shake of his dark head. "Ah, I know. If this doesn't do it then nothing will. Get ready."

"Should I be standing back?" Merlin asked, sarcastically, gesturing at his manacles.

"No," Terra replied, "Just keep _very _still…"

Merlin's eyes widened and he was about to protest just as the shadow unleashed his spell.

"ádílegian!"

A great wave of heat passed over Merlin, pushing him into the wall. He felt like he was the mouth of a furnace and he couldn't draw a breath. His ribs were compressed against his organs. There was no space for his heart to beat. He felt himself falling…

It was only as he hit the hard floor with a painful thud that he realised he was free of his bindings. The spell had succeeded.

Although dazed, Merlin checked himself over and realised that, despite the force of the spell, he was unhurt. Still gasping a little and drawing breath back into his lungs, he struggled to his feet and stared at the shadow.

"_What _was that?"

"Oh, just a little something I concocted in my spare time. I have quite a lot of it down here in case you hadn't noticed."

"You're a tad bit scary, you know that?" Merlin said, simply, before heading for the exit with his ears still ringing.

"You're welcome," Terra answered, drolly.

The pair of them made their way along the tunnel that connected this cavern to the next. Merlin took care and tried to make as little noise as possible. He envied Terra who obviously didn't make a sound as he passed from room to room. The network of tunnels and caves was hugely confusing and Merlin wondered whether he'd end up dying down here anyway from starvation. He was craving fresh air and sunlight and just wanted to get outside, away from here.

"Terra, you must know the way out of here?" Merlin said, desperately to the shadow.

"Hey. I barely ever leave this place. Besides, it's different for a shadow. You have to follow the tunnels. I can just shimmer my way outside."

"Lucky you."

Merlin felt like they were going in circles. He knew that any moment Morgana would realise he had escaped and she would come searching for him. Then he would have to fight her and hope that his magic was stronger than hers. He knew that he was meant to be the greatest warlock of all time but he doubted whether he was experienced enough to claim that title yet. It could be that he was killed by Morgana before he even had a chance to become the most powerful. There was no way of knowing. He didn't feel especially confident, mainly because he'd been deprived of water and food and had been hung up on a wall for a good day. He wasn't feeling at his peak.

"You alright, Merlin?" Terra questioned, concernedly.

"Yeah. I'm just frustrated that we haven't got out yet. We're wasting time."

"It can't be far now," the shadow reassured him.

"I hope not."

* * *

><p>Arthur cursed his broken hand as they made their way through the forest. It meant that he had to hold his sword in his left hand and was therefore off-balance right from the start. If anyone were to attack him now then he would be very vulnerable. He was therefore very glad that his uncle had thought to come out and help him. Although Agravaine wasn't particularly good with a sword, Arthur still felt a great deal safer. At least he had someone to share his problems with. Usually it would be Merlin but he couldn't think about that… nor the fact that he may <em>never <em>have Merlin back at his side.

He couldn't bear the thought of that so he had to refocus his thoughts on the task at hand. They had been walking for an hour now and Arthur could almost sense how close he was to his manservant. The caves that Guinevere had mentioned must be around here somewhere. He spared at brief thought for the young woman and hoped she had done as he bid her and stayed safe. He didn't know what he would do if she were to come to any danger now. Then again, he didn't know what he would do should Merlin die and he would be left to continue his life with the woman he betrayed in the worst manner possible. No, he just had to hope that everything turned out well and they both would live. That way his choice hadn't affected anyone, had it?

His stomach churned sickeningly. He hoped that was true.

"Arthur?" Agravaine called and the young man stopped, turning to face his companion.

"Yes uncle?"

"I don't think we're going the right way."

"How do you know?"

"Well, I…. it seems unlikely that…. er…."

"A cave!"

Arthur ignored his uncle's stammering excuses and leapt towards the cavernous opening. This could be it. This could really be the cave that Guinevere was talking about. Despite the fact that he wanted to charge straight in, Arthur managed to restrain himself in order to properly consider his options. He spun round, his eyes alight with anticipation.

"This is it, Uncle, I know he's in there. I can feel it."

"But sire…"

Arthur frowned. "What? What is your problem, Uncle?"

"I just think…. I just don't think it is a good idea to go into the cave without proper back up. I mean, we are facing down Morgana. She is no helpless girl."

The frown on Arthur's handsome young face grew. "Hang on. I swear I never told you that it was Morgana who had taken Merlin." He paused. "In fact, I'm _certain _I didn't." He took a step towards his uncle. "So how do you know?" His tone was confused but there was definitely an edge of accusation there.

Agravaine could feel the net closing around him.

"I… I'm sure you mentioned it, Arthur. Definitely. You said something about Morgana letting Guinevere go."

"I didn't."

"But…"

Agravaine stumbled back as Arthur took a menacing step forward. Suddenly, his beetle black eyes focused on something behind his nephew.

"Ah, scuppered at the last hurdle, my dear Agravaine. What a shame."

Arthur spun on the spot to see his half-sister standing in the mouth of the cave. His blood boiled at the sight of her. She was the one who had caused him this anguish and this irreversible pain. She was the one who had sought to destroy him from the inside out - breaking his heart into little pieces. She was a monster and he _hated _her.

"Morgana." Venom dripped from his lips. He wanted to spit acid in her face.

"My poor, stupid brother," Morgana replied slowly, in a pitying voice. "_So_ gullible, _so_ needy, _so_ _weak _that he cannot survive without his beloved slaves. I gave you one back. Are you not satisfied?"

"You tricked me."

"Ah, yes. Did you enjoy that, Arthur? I thought it spiced things up a bit. Besides, I'm sure I did you a favour. I mean what red-blooded man would choose his mentally-retarded, buffoon of a manservant over a lusty wench? She's just _itching _to give you what you want, Arthur." Morgana smirked, her tone full of taunting pleasure.

"Where's Merlin?"

"You didn't answer my question."

"Answer mine."

"No," Morgana refused. "I want to know why you chose Merlin over Gwen? What makes him so _special _?"

Arthur growled. "I wouldn't expect you to understand Morgana as you care for not a single other person but yourself."

"But is Gwen not the love of your life?"

"Merlin is my brother."

"Ah, blood is thicker than water? Family loyalties? Well, yes, that would definitely make sense if you were actually related to the boy but you're not. In fact, you and I are the only ones with shared blood here. Oh, and your uncle. So…. theoretically, following your logic, surely that means you should be loyal to… well, us?"

"Over my dead body."

"That can be arranged. Agravaine."

Suddenly, before he could react, Arthur felt a cold, sharp blade at his throat. It dug gently into his skin, resting just on his pulse point. Every time his heart beat, the artery in his neck pressed up and against the dagger.

"You want to kill him now, Morgana?" Agravaine queried, holding the dagger steady at his nephew's vulnerable throat. "What about the plan?"

"He's walked right into my lap. I would be foolish to waste this opportunity."

"Yes, m'lady. And you wish to be the one to kill him?"

"Of course."

"Uncle! How could you do this? I am your flesh and blood," Arthur exclaimed in anger. "You would kill your dead sister's only son?"

"I would." Agravaine's breath was hot on Arthur's ear.

"See, Arthur, Agravaine is a normal red-blooded male. He is fuelled by his need for power – in this case, the throne of Camelot – and his lust for a woman – in this case, me," Morgana explained, smugly.

Agravaine looked up abruptly, his eyes gleaming with hope. Perhaps his dreams would come true after all. With Morgana at his side, they would be unstoppable.

"But what went wrong with you, Arthur? Risking your life and your throne for servants? And even then not even choosing your woman? I ask again what is so special about Merlin?"

"I just know I can't imagine a world without him," Arthur replied, simply. "It wasn't really my choice to make. He means too much to too many people. He _deserves _to live more than anyone. I would have given _my _life for him instead of Gwen's but you wouldn't allow it. Besides, you must have known I would always try and save them both in the end."

"Oh, how very noble and considerate of you," Morgana sneered. "It's a shame your efforts will have been in vain. But look on the brightside, now you get to join him in the afterlife."

Arthur felt like he'd been kicked in the chest. His breath left his body and the whole world went eerily silent for a moment, like he was underwater, as he tried to process her words.

"He's dead?"

"I'm afraid so."

A dizzying sickness threatened to overcome Arthur and his knees almost gave out. That was until the sharp pain of Agravaine's dagger cut into his throat and he was brought to his senses.

"I'll _kill _you Morgana! I'll kill you both!" he roared in agonised anger.

With a strength and speed that no one would have believed possible, Arthur grabbed the dagger from his uncle's hand and wrenched the man over his shoulder, smashing him into the ground. He heard the shatter of Agravaine's shoulder bone as he hit hard earth. This was accompanied by a loud scream. Agravaine carried on screaming in pain as Arthur punched him hard across the face again and again. Once the older man was unconscious, Arthur turned his attention to his sister.

In blind fury, he charged towards her but he suddenly lost his footing and found himself struggling to run on thin air. It was like some invisible force was holding him midair, vines wrapping around his body, constricting. As Morgana's eyes narrowed and turned scarlet, Arthur felt his windpipe start to close and he began flailing like a fish, gasping for air.

"Now, now, Arthur. That's no way to treat your uncle or your sister. I'll have to teach you not to do it again."

Her sharp eyes narrowed even more. Her malicious lips twisting into a thin smirk. Arthur's own eyes were watery and bulging from his face as his airways diminished further.

"STOP!"

Everyone froze in a tableau. Agravaine halted as he tried to lift himself to his feet, blood gushing from his nose. Morgana stopped constricting her helpless victim's airway but still held him above the ground. And Arthur stopped struggling, his round eyes widening even more when he caught sight of the slight figure standing behind Morgana.

"Merlin," he croaked.

Merlin's eyes connected with his briefly and Arthur registered that he seemed to be trying to express something through them but he couldn't work out exactly what. And before he could properly work it out, the manservant had looked away.

"Let him go, Morgana," Merlin ordered, firmly, glaring at his nemesis.

"Merlin, you've escaped _again_. I'm suppose I should be impressed. Then again, it looks like you've had some help." Her sharp green eyes zeroed in on Terra who was cowering against a nearby rock. "You've been up to your old tricks again, Shady? This time I won't be as lenient."

"Leave him out of it, Morgana," Merlin said, fiercely.

The witch raised one perfect dark eyebrow. "Since when did you become protector of everyone, Merlin? Are you trying to play the hero?"

"No."

Morgana contemplated him for a few moments, her lips pursed. Suddenly she seemed to come to a conclusion.

"You know, since I don't really need you anymore, I could let you go, Merlin. After all, I have Arthur here and you were only really a pawn used in order to do that. And on the plus side, you don't even need to feel guilty for leaving him behind because we both know that he left _you _behind when he could have saved you."

"Arghhh!" Arthur tried to protest vehemently but he was stopped but an invisible hand clamping over his mouth. Instead, he had to watch the small deflation of Merlin's stance, the hurt and heartbreak in his eyes. He wanted to yell out that he hadn't betrayed him if only to stop that expression.

"I still won't go. I won't leave him to die." The boy rounded his shoulders and braced himself. He was loyal to a fault.

"Ooh, how valiant. A true soldier of Camelot. But Merlin, really, what are you going to achieve when I kill both you and Arthur?"

"That isn't going to happen."

Morgana had to laugh as she stared at the skinny serving boy, battered and bruised, with not a single weapon in his hands. It would be as easy as swatting a fly.

"I'll let you watch, Arthur," Morgana said and thrust the king through the air so he thudded against a nearby oak. "Then you get to see your friend die after all."

Ignoring the searing pain in his hand and his back – from the heavy impact against the tree – Arthur couldn't help but be transfixed by the showdown between his helpless servant and the fearsome witch. He didn't want to watch but he couldn't tear his eyes away from the boy he had tried to do everything to save. It couldn't end like this!

"ácwellan !" Morgana said, coldly, unleashing a knife of green light.

_Move! _Arthur screamed inside his head as Merlin stood absolutely stock-still.

"randgebeorh" Merlin replied, softly… and the knife of light evaporated.


	9. Fight to the Death

**Author's Note - Soooo, I haven't updated this story in a VERY long time. Sorry - I have excuses: travelling and now med school. Not sure whether it might even be a year or more. But I thought I'd try to finish it for all you loyal people. Sorry again. I haven't written in a long time so I hope its up to scratch.**

**Also, just to remind you this is set last series before Gwen is Queen.**

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><p>Merlin felt kind of peculiar, like he had done something completely wrong but then so utterly right at the same time. The magic building in his hands and tingling in his fingers warmed him to the core, made him feel powerful – invincible even – but the acid in his gut made him want to roll on the floor and vomit. The expression on Morgana's face full of shock and anger made him glow with pride but the expression on his master's…. full of fear and confusion made his heart feel like lead. He had done it now. He had ruined everything…<p>

But he couldn't turn back. Then everything would have been for nothing.

"What is this?!" Agravaine was the first to find his voice, muffled though it was by the blood pouring down his face. "How can he….?" The man trailed off, at a loss.

Morgana, who was still pale as a sheet, seemed to regain some of her functions as well. Her complexion smoothed and she seemed to collect herself. Her dark green eyes zeroed in on Merlin with curiosity – mixed in with a healthy dose of contempt.

"Well Merlin…" she paused and glanced at Arthur, "Isn't this a surprise for us all? What a _dirty _little secret you've been hiding all these years…" Her lips twisted in a sly smile. "Fancy keeping such a thing from your friend and master… your _king, _in fact." She spared a glance at Arthur again, seemingly trying to gauge his reaction. Thus far, the king was giving little away except confusion. "Is this, perhaps, the longest assassination attempt in history?"

"No!" Merlin shouted, vehemently, his eyes flashing with anger. "I would never do anything to hurt Arthur."

"Is that so?" Morgana sneered. "But you're a _sorcerer_…"

"I would lay down my life for my king in an instant."

Morgana leaned towards Merlin a bit with a small conspiratorial grin spreading across her face. She mock whispered, "Merlin, you do realise Arthur _hates _sorcerers, don't you? He would have killed _you _the instant he knew what you were."

Merlin's head dropped and he tore his gaze away from Morgana, seemingly unable to face her words. "I know…" His voice broke slightly.

"Well I wouldn't kill you Merlin, now I know what you are. You're one of us." The dark haired witch took a small step towards her opponent. "You could forget Arthur and his kind - fools that they are - and you could join the true rulers of Camelot."

Her words were met with silence. Merlin merely stared back at the woman who had been trying to destroy the Camelot he had been trying to build and found he couldn't even consider her offer as he only felt disgust. No matter whether Arthur tried to kill him, he could never be happy handing the kingdom over to the likes of Morgana. She barely even had a soul any more.

"I don't think that that's going to happen, Morgana," he stated, solemnly.

Morgana contemplated him for a few moments and then shrugged.

"I gave you an opportunity, Merlin; you should have been a sensible boy and taken it. I'm not going to give you another chance."

"And I'm not going to give you another chance either, Morgana," Merlin replied, softly. "I've honestly given you enough and you've caused enough heartbreak for one lifetime."

"Is that so….?" Morgana said with a bark of a laugh. "We'll see, stupid boy. Átorspereu!"

A shower of deadly spears flew from nowhere and headed straight for Merlin. The youth looked helpless to stop them. Each point would pierce him like a pin cushion in a seamstress' sewing room. That was until his eyes shone as gold as the coins in Arthur's treasury.

"æledfýr," Merlin answered the spell with a hugely powerful one of this own, igniting the spears and sending them to dust in an instant. A dark mist of burnt wood filled the air and spear heads clattered to the forest floor. "I think you might have to try harder than that," the boy sniped, a small grin curling his lips when he saw Morgana's astonishment. "ýst!"

Nothing happened for a moment and Morgana had the time to look smug before the trees around them started rustling. The rustling grew much louder and more persistent. Suddenly a wind that had come from nowhere began ripping up dust and dirt from the ground. It spiralled upwards, taking the shape of a small tornado, accumulating and destroying anything that got in its way. Morgana let out a screech of fear as it threatened to envelop her entirely, whipping at her hair and her cloak and pulling her closer to its fatal embrace.

"geswican" Her arms flailed but the spell seemed to have the desired effect as the wind died down and she was safe once more. Now it was Morgana's turn to unleash her magic and she did so with gusto – directing all her hatred at the boy who had time and again thwarted her plans. "Die you foul servant! Metodsceaft!"

Merlin only just had time to peform a brief blocking spell before the force of Morgana's loathing knocked him flying backwards. It seemed that her anger and her fear had made her stronger. The young warlock landed hard against a nearby tree, cracking his head on an exposed root. Hissing with pain, Merlin tried to stand but felt a searing agony shoot through his skull. The pain was almost blinding but he knew that if he did not fight through it then Morgana would finish him off.

With gritted teeth, Merlin clambered as quickly as he could to his feet and was just in time to fend off another fearsome spell from his opponent before it killed him. Merlin felt exhausted after the onslaught and was trying to focus on anything other than the agony in his head but his vision was fuzzy around the edges and he felt very light-headed. As he tried to walk he wobbled like a new-born foal on spindly legs. There was no way he could fight Morgana in this condition. He was done for.

"Oh Merlin, what a pity you should waste the little talent that you have in this way," he heard Morgana saying, vaguely. It was like trying to listen to someone talking on the other side of a thick oak door. He winced as he tried to hear. "Not as powerful as you thought, eh?"

Suddenly he felt her hand drop onto his shoulder. When had she got so close? The fingers of the hand trailed up from his shoulder to cup his chin. At first the touch was gentle but then the fingers turned to pincers, digging into his skin. Morgana yanked him towards her so they were nose to nose. As she spoke he could feel the spittle landing on his face.

"No one is as powerful as me, _Merlin_. You should have known a jumped up serving boy wouldn't stand a chance." Her grip tightened. Merlin was determined not to give her the satisfaction of seeing it hurt but between the pain there and the agony in his head he felt his eyes begin to water. His cheeks burnt with humiliation. "Now, what should I do with you? Should I kill you? Should I do it quickly – like an axe? Or _slowly_? I could take my time, enjoy it." Her eyes bore into Merlin's, gleaming with excitement and malice. "I could torture you for days, you know. It would be so… satisfying, I think." She paused. "What would you rather, Merlin?"

Merlin didn't reply. He merely glowered at her.

"Answer me!"

Merlin's eyes darkened with hate but he did not open his lips.

"I am in control!" Morgana hissed, raking her long nails down one cheek. "So answer me!" She slapped him hard across the face. Her hand came away wet with the blood she had caused from her scratches.

Both of them were breathing hard now, glaring into each other's eyes as if the mere intensity could break the other one.

"STOP!"

The voice that cut into their standoff was a surprise to the pair of them. They were no longer seemingly alone in their power struggle.

"Stop or I'll kill him!"

Merlin and Morgana both turned to look and saw that Arthur was on his feet – albeit slightly wobbly – and had a sword to his uncle's throat. Agravaine was whimpering and shaking like a frightened little boy.

Morgana met her brother's gaze a shrugged. "Go on then."

Agravaine looked horrified, his beetle black eyes widened to the size of dinner plates. "M'lady, you cannot mean….?"

"Do you not care for him, Morgana? Let Merlin go and I'll spare him," Arthur said, his voice fierce.

"Not in the slightest. He was helpful for a time but I don't have any need for him now. Not now I'm going to kill you and Merlin in the next few minutes."

"But…but…" Agravaine pleaded.

"Kill him," Morgana urged, a smile curling her lips once more. "He can be your last victim before you too meet the gods. Won't it be poetic to end your mother's line in one day?"

"You have no heart, Morgana," Arthur stated, softly, "But a king does not go back on his word."

The cool blade of the sword sliced easily through the warm skin of Agravaine's neck, parting skin and tendon and artery. The look of a man with a broken heart was painted on Agravaine's face the moment that he passed over to the other side, his life drained out of him. It would be his last ever expression.

"Kinslayer," Morgana murmured as she watched her ally's blood drip onto the floor. "You will forever be remembered as a kinslayer, Arthur Pendragon."

"So be it," Arthur said – although his voice cracked slightly. "Now I will kill you Morgana and I will be a double kinslayer, if you don't let Merlin go."

"Oh, you still want your _servant _back do you?" Morgana said, her tone full of mocking. Roughly she grabbed Merlin and threw him in front of her, between herself and Arthur. The warlock hit the ground like a sack of potatoes – the impact of several head wounds in a matter of days had seemingly taken its toll. Morgana snorted at his helplessness. "Even though he's a self-confessed, _self-proven_ sorcerer?"

Arthur didn't miss a beat. "Yes. Now give him to me or you'll lose your head." He pointed the still bloody blade of the sword at her.

"Ha, somehow I don't think it's me that will be losing my head today, dear brother. In fact, I think your head would like rather nice on a spike on Camelot's battlements, don't you think? Although the crows may ruin your oh-so handsome face a little and I'm very sorry about that."

In that moment Arthur lunged, Morgana lifted her arm with the fatal words already on her cold, emotionless lips and Merlin rose to his feet. And in the moment after Arthur stumbled to a halt behind his manservant, Morgana's spell flew through the air and hit Merlin square in the chest.

Arthur couldn't help but cry out.

"Merlin!"

The boy fell in a graceful arc and hit the floor with a stomach-turning thud. He lay motionless.

"Merlin!" Arthur cried out again. It was a cry full of anguish and loss.

But then – somehow – the crumpled form moved. At first it was just a little but then his legs found movement and so did his arms, pushing the fallen warlock back to his unsteady feet. Both Arthur and Morgana watched in astonishment.

"Morgana," Merlin wheezed, swaying, "You used to be a lady I respected and a friend I loved..." He paused, gathering his breath. "But now you are just a sick, twisted monster that has somehow replaced her…. And I can't say I feel any remorse for doing this because you are not Morgana Pendragon any more. _ácwellan_."

There was a blinding light and then before Arthur knew it, Morgana's corpse was left in an undignified, pitiful heap on the floor.

"It's finally over," Merlin breathed – and he was not just talking about the death of his nemesis. With these words, his legs buckled beneath him and he fell to the ground unconscious.

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><p><strong>Please review. Hopefully I will get another chapter up in the next few days and it will be about Arthur dealing with the aftermath of his choice and how Merlin feels about it all methinks. (Just to remind people who have forgotten. I really don't like Gwen that much so people who like her more than Merlin may not enjoy this story. everyone else, you should be fine :D)<strong>


	10. The Brink of Death

**Author's Note - Thanks for the reviews. I hope you enjoyed Merlin at the weekend. **

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><p>The forest was eerily quiet. Usually there would be squirrels scampering over tree branches and birds twittering between their roosts but at this moment everything seemed to have vanished. There wasn't a creature in sight. Occasionally the leaves of the trees would rustle in the light breeze but that was the only thing Arthur could hear other than his own heavy breathing.<p>

Grunting, he hefted the dead weight of his manservant higher up on his shoulder to avoid the boy tumbling into the dirt and ploughed on. It was midday and the sun was beating down on them despite it being autumn and Arthur could feel the perspiration gathering at the nape of his neck, trickling down his back. His fringe was also stuck to his forehead with salty, warm sweat – it was dark brown with moisture. Carrying Merlin was exhausting work, despite the manservant being half his weight, and Arthur was beginning to slow. Every time he felt his step falter, however, he gritted his teeth and forced himself to move forward because he had a feeling that every second counted. He had to get Merlin to Gaius or else he wasn't sure whether the young man would survive. In truth, Arthur didn't believe he'd last the night and that thought scared him terribly.

Occasionally Arthur would glance back at Merlin's pallid face – almost grey in colouring – and wince. Merlin was without a doubt on the brink of death and Arthur couldn't let that happen. He knew there were other things to consider about what happened outside that cave but right now all he could focus on was healing his friend.

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><p>It was nearing sunset by the time Arthur tumbled into the courtyard of Camelot Castle. As soon as he arrived he was met by a crowd of people including Gwen who smiled broadly at him but then dropped her expression as soon as she saw the state of Merlin.<p>

"What happened?" she asked, hurriedly, placing a warm hand on Merlin's cool skin.

"Its… it's a long story. I need to get him to Gaius," Arthur replied and then frowned. "I thought I told you to wait where I left you Guinevere. I went back to look for you…"

"Oh, I'm sorry if I worried you, Arthur, but you were gone so long that I thought it would be best to head back to Camelot before it grew too dark. I thought that way we would find each other more easily."

Arthur nodded in agreement. "I see." But inside he was cursing the time he'd wasted searching for Gwen when he could have been bringing Merlin back to Gaius. Of course he couldn't voice his thoughts aloud.

"Sire! Would you like help carrying Merlin to Gaius? Your hand… it must be hurting you greatly." Sir Leon had appeared in front of him, offering a supportive arm.

"I don't care a whit about my hand," Arthur answered more fiercely than he intended. He felt a little guilty when Leon's eyes widened and he took a cautionary step back. "Yes, help me carry him. I fear it could be too late."

The rest of the knights swarmed around them and all helped carry Merlin towards the physician's chambers. By the time they'd reached Gaius, someone had obviously already gotten word to him as he was preparing potions and dressings as they arrived. He spun on the spot when he heard the door bang open and hurried over.

"Quickly, quickly, put him on the bed!" The old man's voice was full of worry and urgency. Arthur didn't like the sound of it at all. "Now, stand back and let me work."

Immediately, the physician began checking Merlin's pulse, feeling his temperature, checking his pupils. All the while he muttered unintelligibly to himself. The furrow between his eyebrows deepened the more he inspected Merlin's injuries.

"Terrible head wound…." he murmured, "That will need stitching… no, it's infected, it will need to be covered first…" He continued with his examination for a couple more moments before he looked up and saw all the knights still standing there. "What are you still doing here? There is nothing you can do to help so get out of my way." The uncharacteristic anger in Gaius' voice alerted Arthur even more to the fact that this must be very, very serious. Usually nothing could upset the ancient doctor.

The knights who had carried Merlin in left quickly, although several of the dithered, wanting to make sure their friend was going to be safe. However, one more sharp bark from Gaius and they left sharpish. Only Arthur remained.

"My lord, I don't know if you should remain for this…"

"How is it looking, Gaius?" Arthur said, ignoring his words.

Gaius paused and gave him a discerning look. "Not good, sire, not good at all… I'm… I'm afraid he might not make it this time."

"Why?"

"Because his body is shutting down as we speak, system by system," Gaius replied, gravely. "What _happened _out there, Arthur?"

"It was Morgana," Arthur murmured, not taking his eyes off Merlin's grey face, "She tried to kill me. Merlin got in the way… but he _survived_! He got up again and he killed her. He killed Morgana, Gaius! Right in front of me."

Gaius was surveying him with a very peculiar look – a mixture of confusion, apprehension and hope.

"How did Merlin kill Morgana, sire?" The old man's voice was soft, wary.

Arthur took a moment to gather his thoughts before he said, "By magic, Gaius."

The eyebrow that was perpetually raised on Gaius's forehead lifted even higher and the old man looked as if he might faint. He was almost the same colour as his dying ward. Arthur observed all these changes in Gaius' demeanour and deduced that the physician who had treated him all his life, who he trusted with everything, had already known about Merlin's magic. It seemed everyone he had thought he could trust was not all that they seemed – even the man who delivered him into this world. He wasn't sure how he felt about this so he filed it for later. It was the same file that held his feelings on Merlin's _use _of magic.

"So if he survived her spell then why is he dying?" Arthur broke the tension, focussing their attention back on Merlin.

Gaius blinked a couple of times. "I fear his… magic was only powerful enough to stop her spell from killing him instantly. He gave himself enough time to kill her but once he'd done that…. well, his body just started shutting down." There was water gathering in Gaius' eyes; his voice was a little choked.

"But…" Arthur didn't know why he protested. Maybe he thought by the mere action of protesting that all the problems would go away. He knew better than that though. He was king, not a small boy anymore. He could deal with this, couldn't he? The familiar pain in his heart was back again though, like someone had stabbed a shard of jagged glass inside the soft, red tissue and twisted mercilessly. Without another word he collapsed on a nearby chair, breathing heavily.

"Are you alright, sire?" Gaius said with concern.

"I'm…. I'm fine. Focus on Merlin," Arthur exclaimed, wincing as the pain worsened. "Please… is there nothing you can do, Gaius? No hope at all?"

Gaius shook his head. "The only person who could save Merlin is, ironically, himself." A small wry smile twisted the old man's lips for a second but it slipped away almost instantly. "I'm sorry, Arthur."

Arthur's cheeks felt hot all of a sudden and so did his neck and his ears; in fact, all of him was enveloped in an uncomfortable heat. He stood up but light-headedness made him sit down again almost immediately.

"I'll see if I can ease your discomfort, sire," Gaius said and set about mixing up something to reduce the symptoms that Arthur was experiencing. Arthur wanted to shout at him to stop, to do something for Merlin but he knew that if Gaius thought there was any hope for the boy then he would be helping him.

Arthur's eyes began to sting and his throat began narrowing, constricting the air to his lungs and making him choke a little. He hadn't experienced this feeling in a long time, not since his father died. However, in this case, he wasn't sure whether he'd ever get over the grief. Everything seemed so overwhelming.

"Sire," Gaius murmured, near his ear and Arthur looked up to see him offering a cup of something. Usually, the king wasn't keen on taking drugs for emotions but in this case he didn't see how he could cope without them. Gratefully, he took the cup and swallowed the contents. It tasted gritty and smoky and he wrinkled his nose at the flavour.

He was looking into the bottom of the empty cup when he felt Gaius draw up a chair beside him. A warm hand was placed onto his quivering back. Arthur bit back his tears; fought to hold himself together. His knee bounced continuously as if he were channelling all of his emotions into that one limb in an attempt to conceal them. He waited for Gaius to speak. He didn't want to hear what the old man had to say. It would hurt too much.

However, Gaius seemed to understand his need for silence and the two of them just sat in mutual grief as they watched their friend slip further away.

After a time, Gaius sighed, heavily. "Not long now, sire. Would you like me to fetch anyone else?"

"No, Gaius, I think we're enough. The others can say their goodbyes afterward." Arthur's voice was a little stronger now thanks to the effects of Gaius' soothing potion. "Though we will need to get hold of Hunith as soon as possible."

"Yes, sire."

The lapsed into quiet again.

"He was a good man," Gaius said, softly, his eyes never leaving his ward. "Humble, kind, generous, brave. He was much more than you ever gave him credit for, Arthur."

Arthur frowned. "You think I didn't know he was all those things, Gaius?" His tone was rather hurt. "Of course I did. Why do you think I kept him around all the time? Why do you think I came to think of him as my best friend? He was the best man I've ever known."

There was a pause. "And even now - now that you know about his magic - is he still the best man you've ever known?"

"Yes," Arthur replied without hesitation.

"Good," Gaius said, placing a gentle, calloused hand on Merlin's pale forehead. "It's a shame that it's too late for you to tell him that."

"I know."

Arthur felt his insides clench at the thought of Merlin having magic all the time he'd known him. Obviously he felt quite betrayed by his manservant who had kept this huge secret from him for so long whilst living right under his nose but even more so, he felt sorry for the poor young warlock having to hide his true identity for years out of fear. And he also felt massively guilty for not giving Merlin enough reason to trust him with his burden. He obviously wasn't as good a friend as he thought he was.

He wanted Merlin to be conscious now if only to tell him that he would be forgiven, that he would be accepted and wouldn't have to live a lie anymore. But that was not to be. Merlin would go to his grave as an unappreciated nobody, a mere serving boy. That thought made Arthur's heart ache all over again. He deserved so much more.

"Is he in pain?" Arthur asked, quietly, staring at the flickering eyelids of his manservant.

"Perhaps a little but I've given him all I can to help that without sending him into unconsciousness permanently."

"Oh…"

"But it is bound to be painful when all your organs stop working and there is not a lot I can do." Gaius seemed angry at himself for not being able to ease his ward's passing into the next life. He stroked the boy's forehead again. It was now damp with sweat. "You deserved longer, my boy, you really did. You should be the one outliving me." Tears were leaking unchecked down the physician's face.

"I should be the one in his place," Arthur lamented, "It was me that spell was meant for."

Gaius looked up sharply. "No - don't you go feeling guilty. Merlin gave his life to protect you, the least you can do is be grateful. He knew that something like this would happen eventually… We both just hoped it wouldn't be for a long time."

"What do you mean?" Arthur sounded genuinely puzzled.

"Merlin dedicated his life to protecting yours. His fate and yours were sealed together. Since he's known you, well, let's just say you've been saved from the gods a good few times by Merlin even though you had no idea. He couldn't tell you because he was using magic. All I have to say is at least it stopped his head getting too big because he couldn't boast about it to anyone – only me and I'm a boring old fart." Gaius smiled, weakly. "You have no idea how many times he came back to me moaning about how he'd saved your life and you had no idea _again_. I just told him that you'd appreciate him one day."

"I did… I _do_," Arthur replied, mulling over what Gaius had said. "And that's why we can't give up on him yet because he has to know that all he did was not for nothing."

"Sire…"

"No, there must be another sorcerer I can get. I'll do anything. We just have to heal him!"

**Review? **


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